#he couldve gone to so many better places why did it have to be that one

[offside-the-lines]

Im so fucking devastated about beau being traded to ch*cago. Im just sick. I want him to be happy. He was so happy in Vancouver. How could you do this to him after he has already been violently ripped from the arms of his lover best friend.

[radiation]

I kind of want to hear your thoughts wrt how anya couldve been handled better. Do you think the pregnancy part shouldve just not been there in the first place? I cant think of any ending for her that is less gruesome that doesnt also change many aspects of all the later parts of the game. And also in general i just think you have interesting takes on the game and i wanna hear more

Good question and i will provide my thoughts under the cut. Listless unfiltered stuff tho Im so out of it right now but im chilling.

As a conclusion of all that precedes it I agree, the ending is properly gruesome and its hard to say it should've been done any other way. If we're being faithful to the story and her character as-is i'd say less so change the major events and moreso change the way they're delivered and slip in more respectful characterization of anya here and there through fleshing out her life and personal motivations, even if it's just hints of it

However unless they really really did a crazy good job i probably still wouldnt like it. But that's like, the unfortunate domino effect of writing a character like her, i feel that her character/place in the story is misogynistic on a pretty fundamental level and eliminating that would require restructuring things about her character/the story. But idk, who's to say they couldnt have.

Its complicated because theres all these different layers of narrative decisions being made that influence other shit and the more fundamental of a choice you change, the greater differences there will be down the road. Its butterfly effect shit. Like sometimes i think about this in my own projects. I think about like, what if while developing my own game, i'd made the 2 main characters completely different people? What if they were fucking like, Kevin and Trent, and id gone down the whole pipeline of fleshing out their characters and actually made them genuinely good. If thats what I made and thats what everyone was used to and then I randomly replaced them with Neal and Jack and the themes associated with them, people would be like. Thats wrong why the fuck did you do that. You ruined the themes bro. But the same is true of the other way around. You have to ask: is what's in front of me truly the best version it could have possibly been, or could it have been any number of things, and I'm just attached to what's right in front of me?

Its not to say you cant write about misogyny or sexual assault, or that there aren't people with experiences like Anya and you can't write about them. It's more asking like, out of all of the routes they couldve gone with wrt having any female characters whatsoever why did they choose this one specifically. If they had from the get-go written a bit of a different character with different themes and went down that whole road, no pregnancy or whatever but some other shit more impactful for what was there, they could have potentially written something equally or more powerful, just tackling a different vein of subject matters.

Like not saying at all this is what they should've written, I think its kind of lame, this is just a random ass example. But what if the conflict between Anya and Jimmy was them previously being like, rivals for the same position at their job, and likely due to misogyny in the system Jimmy ended up getting it instead of her. Anya is essentially in the same position of inferiority under Jimmy that Jimmy is under Curly and while Jimmy is obsessed with this narrative of him not getting what he deserves and lashes out, Anya is forced to grin and bear it, and their characters are meant to call attention to the gap in acceptable behaviors and entitlement that is created by patriarchal society. Idk. I think theres already hints of that and its way less emotionally impactful than whats there rn but the point is like, it still could've been well executed, and if thats what was there, people wouldnt be asking like "wow this sucks ass i really wish anya had gotten sexually assualted instead" LOL do you know wha ti mean.

I dont even know what my point is right now but idk I guess i dont have a good answer for what is the best thing they couldve done differently. I can only speak for my own preferences and honestly I dont write about this subject matter at all. Like ill be honest the specific subject of women being abused/assaulted makes me so upset i dont want to put even a fraction of an ounce of that into the world period, so i just dont write about it, my mind always goes to women dealing with other kinds of conflicts instead. And I generally tend to write more about things like microaggressions and the complexities of relationships rather than unbelievable injustices without relief. I lay a lot of respect on my characters, when horrible things happen to them I offset the events into the realm of neutrality by affording them things like privacy and moments of calm and monotony. I like writing like this and i think its good but its certainly somewhat informed by me living a privileged lifestyle. So yknow who am i to say what experiences you should write about.

Well i just looked it up and it seems like the main developers on the game are both men so im gonna say actually yeah Methinks they should've just straight up written something else. I mean i have no way of knkowing their experiences for sure but im gonna take a wild guess and say they dont have a lot of skin in this game. Also i just realized they also made how a fish is made that game looked pretentious as fuck sorry.

[ffsg0jo]

I ABSOLUTELY AGREE WITH EVERYTHING HERE!

I remember getting to the last chapter and being extremely cringed up by the behavior of everybody, especially of jean and reiner, because they were two of my favorite characters and I felt like they went through so much growth just to be used as comic relief, as if the original creator wanted to ease up the tragedy of the whole finale with those skits, which I... do get could have happened still but ugh... I think that there should have been a better way.

also ahead after this spoilers of the ending of aot!

I stg the whole skit with reiner I was like 'is this the same traumatized man who's constantly trying to quit it?' because like I get that maybe it's to show that it's an 'happy' ending but it doesn't erase simply everything they have gone through. especially I feel like this way of portraying him just deleted any chance of healing.

also for ever annoyed about jean ending with mikasa, not just because of him but also because it ruined the relationship that they had been having which I felt like was very much based on a lot of respect. like I don't think that the mikasa that we saw through the story would have married jean and kept on being stuck on even, like it made 0 sense for me for them to end up together. like I don't get why they couldn't keep the two of them as single.

AND PLS THE HISTORIA ENDING WITH A MAN? when it's implied the whole pregnancy and being used against her own will? I... was like... ma'am... pls blink two times if you are in danger.

I low key remember getting to the final chapter and being all happy because my faves survived but after a bit I was like 'is... is that all we got?'. there were, indeed, so many fan theories which had a WHOLE lot more potential ugh.

(also I agree, levi was the sole one whose ending I enjoyed because it felt fitting; it was a good way to portray the effects of everything he had gone through with having still an happy tone to it, which I think should have been a treatment all the other characters deserved)

alright sorry for the ted talk, I'll see myself out!

have a lovely day!

yes !! i feel like he wanted to create a lighthearted ending but he ended up sacrificing the character development of certain characters and it was just sad to see. they regressed entirely imo. i reread the the last couple of chapters/arc and ik there's a timeskip but they'd been through war and lost so many of their friends and family. wdym they came out unscathed. i agree with what you said it couldve been done in a better way where you can see the progression and healing more.

reiner will forever hurt my heart though like when i saw him sniffing the letter i wanted to bawl. he completely changed, he was a literal shell of a person and i wanted to see his healing more. he was suicidal and had ptsd and it takes time to recover and heal from that, and even then some people never do!

YESSS THANK YOUUU !!! mikasa and jean were very much good friends and had a lot of trust and mutual respect for each other. the only way i can see them getting married is if it's a marriage of convenience for tax benefits or something. i truly don't think mikasa wouldve done that to jean knowing he was a place holder for eren.

i actually wouldnt have minded pieck and jean if i'm being honest. i feel like they would've vibed together and would've gotten along if it wasnt for the whole titan shenanigans.

I WAS SO DISAPPOINTED WHEN HISTORIA ACTUALLY HAD A CHILD WITH A MANN BECAUSE AS YOU SAID EVERYTHING POINTED TO HER BEING FORCED TO CONCIEVE A CHILD. LIKE WITH EREN VISITING HER, THAT WHOLE DISCUSSION, I TRULY THOUGHT HISTORIA GOT PREGNANT AS A PLOT POINT. her being pregnant was just so inconsequential, a useless detail at the end. and all those panels with her and eren ended up being somewhat useless. i read fan theories with better direction, i remember the whole eren is the father thing and wholeheartedly believed that was going to happen, even though i did NOT want it to.

yesss, levi was the only thing done well about the ending and i firmly stand by that. it's exactly as you said i was so happy they all survived and then i thought about it more and thought ...... that was a bit shit.

he is releasing chapter 140 though soo hopefully that clears some things up??? or helps fixes things?? idekkk

[robotnuts]

im so glad u watched 19 bc i truly have soooo many thoughts on like theres so much potential & really good scenes there but so many misses. the tex part is easily the best part of it though i still cant believe it actually happened. i kinda wish sarge's death was off screen like you see them watch him die but give him no final words sort of deal... i feel like it wouldve been a better plot device rather than the longer scene if sarge saying what he's feeling as he dies. sorry i keep thinking about that its my main thing i wouldve changed. well that and putting wash back in prison instead of a mental facility because i think a prison break with untreated mental illness couldve done more than ....... whatever the hell the wash scenes were. restoration is easily the best set up for fanwork ive seen in a while tho NGL the meta tucker concept is soooo fun i wish it got explored more. sorry im rambling in ur askbox now LOL

YESSS sorry for the late response. im glad rvb restoration dropped hwen it did so ic ould watch it irl with my girlfriend but it did happen to be during the most busy month of my year so obviously my blogging has been completely slacking. i really love this final line that apparently sarge was going to say. i think its more sweet and poetic than him spelling out how hes feeling about simmons and grif in particular

no yeah my biggest issue is just like. this felt like a vehicle for like, meta scenes saying goodbye to the reds and the blues, but the actual like "plot" of the season didnt really have any time to develop and had to just be quick weird scenes that were just kind of tonally dissonant and not really polished or treated with the same kind of care and deftness he was able to handle mixing the humor and plot elements of the recollections trilogy. both due to the runtime, him being out of the game for so long, and needing to do a full plot in one season instead of three. it really felt bare bones. which is fine it's just like, obviously you can see that its not the best, and i feel like if it was going to just be a vehicle for sappy goodbye to rvb as a property scenes i wish it had just gone all in and given us more interactions between the different characters. idk. im not really sure how id fix it aside from just having my own completely differnet version of their future in my head but ive already kind of written that post out for my post chorus vision lmao. dumpster baby forever...

META TUCKER IS REALLY FUN AND I COULDNT BE TOO MAD AT IT because it was literally a type of concept that epsilontucker riffed on after the open ended s13 (oh my god rip epsilontucker i think im gonna be sick). but his scenes again felt pretty jarring nad just put in there to keep the season moving and wahh why did they torture him for 10 fucking years ahhh scary AHHH. yeah, now that you said it it really does feel like. the bare bones of an incredible 250k word fanfic written by someone who has a different more serious tone than the original series like, put my guns in the ground style, moreso than an rvb season LMFAO but that's fine if anyones still in the fandom and cares to do that i'd love to see it. idk. im rambling. it was a good fun stream and i liked individual scenes but it was definitely all over the place for me

[strawberry-jammers]

My melody (pt1)

a ghostbur x reader where you get injured and a friendly ghost is there to help

part 1 part 2 part 3

this is very much unedited lmao

Hearing the cheers of my fellow citizens was music to my ears.

We fought long and hard to get lmanburg back, some of us thought it would never happen. That we would never win the long and tedious battle, but we did. Having to fight dream, schlatt, or anyone that tried to destroy what we had. Anyone would have been proud to stand here, having won the battles we faced.

So why wasn't he here?

Wilbur soot, our very first president, wasn't here to watch tubbo give his speech.

He was no where in sight really.

I looked over at Tommy, who was seated next to me.

"Hey, have you seen will? Hes not here." Tommy looked at me, the expression he had was an annoyed one. "I don't know where that bitch is. Now I'm trying to watch my bestfriends speech so shut the fuck up." Why did i ask him? Sighing, i look back at tubbo.

Hes probably off somewhere playing solitaire or something.

___

"EVERYONE RUN!!" explosions rang threw out lmanburg. It didn't help that we had to also fight technoblade and his withers.

"(Y/N) GET THE KIDS TO SAFTEY!" Nikki said frantically, grabbing a shield to stop techno's fire works.

"ON IT!!" I ran towards tommy and tubbo, the ones fighting techno by themselves. "ATOP FIGHTING THE DAMN MAN YOU TWO!" I grabbed tubbo, who followed withought question. "TOMMY LETS GO!" Tommy stared on at techno, not moving from his spot. "WE DONT HAVE TIME FOR THIS!" i forcefully grabbed tommys arm, running with him and tubbo away from lmanburg.

"STOP WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? WE NEED TO FIGHT HIM!" Tommy said, fighting out of my grip. "WE CANT WITH ALL THESE ECPLOSIONS, NOW COME ON!!"

After a bit, we managed to get to the borders of lmanburg. Meeting niki, fundy and jack there as well.

"(Y/n) I couldve beat him! You shouldnt 've dragged me away!"

"Tommy the place was exploding from beneath us, You wouldve lost a life." He glared at me, sitting down on the grass with the rest of us.

"Say (y/n), do you think the others can defeat that wither?" Jack asks, sitting next to niki. "I belive so, they had already killed the first 2 before we left." He nodded, relaxing a bit.

We could still hear the explosions and wither from here. We looked on as techno fired more fire works at the others.

"I wanna help." Tommy says, starting to stand up. "No your not going anywhere! Were staying by the lmantree- and hes gone." I ran after him, tubbo following behind me. "GET BACK HERE YOU BITCH!!" another explosion whent off, from right beneath me.

"FUCK!" I flew to the ground, scrapping my hands and knees. I screamed in pain. My skin hot and slightly brunt. It got my legs, and mostly the left side of my body.

Tubbo ran towards me. "(Y/N)!!" I layed there, in to much pain to move. Tubbo frantically looked around. "Ill go get niki!! Just hang tight okay!!" He ran back towrds the lmantree, leaving me on the 'battle field'. I soon heard yelling. I looked up to see philza and wil- wait wilbur?

He was yelling at a very hurt philza. His wings where scorched, his big feathers completely gone. Wil looked as crazed as ever.

I couldnt exactly hear what they where saying, my ears ringing like crazy. Phil was holding a sword, will holding phils sholders, as if he was begging for something.

My vision whent all splotchy. It got hard to see, and the ringing got worse. I felt someone pick me up right before my vison completely left me.

I dont remember anything after that.

~~~

Weeks passed, I awoke only a few days later. Hearing the news of wilbur dying, lmanburg being completely destroyed, and tubbo rebuilding the destroyed nation.

people visited me in the make shift home everyday (glad I built a home outside of lmanburg). People stared at me different for the scorch marks I had, but only in a sympathetic way. Tubbo had said we matched, knowing how painful it was. It was sweet of him in a way.

Tommy visited the day after i woke up. having heard i had ran after him, He apologized, only wanting to help the others. He didnt mean for me to get hurt.

"I didnt mean for this to happen, i just wanted to fight the blade, im sorry-" I smiled at him. "Its alright Tommy. Its not your fault, im just unlucky is all."

As the days whent on, the more I wanted to just get up and leave. I wasnt completely healed yet, so i was just forced to lay around till i got to do anything. I knew i couldnt do that, in fear of anything healing wrong, so i read instead.

Its a book ive read thousand times over, partly due to us not having many books around here(alot where burned in the explosions).

"This book truely never gets old." Turning the page, I heard the door knocking quietly.

"You can come in!" The door opend slowly, revealing a slightly.. Transparent? Figure. I dropped my book slightly, getting a better look at the figure.

"Hello (y/n)!! Oh, you seem unwell, here have some blue!!"

[tiens-letters]

upon autumns day, where you and I met. upon autumns day where I remember all of what we were before youve passed. and upon autumns day would I have ever so slowly let go of that pain of the past

zhongli (angst)

@albeidoof its somewhere here hehehe

Time was a luxury. A treasure each and everything holds.

Yet time is a curse as well. It covets, devours and leaves. which humanity neglects to cherish until the heart ceases its steady rythmn, only then do they regret of the wasted minutes, hours and seconds.

Beneath the flow of the rushing waves of things that have come and gone. Only on this particular day would he sit beneath a certain tree. The rough bark brushing up against his back as leaves fell effortlessly to the ground, as if it were ready to let go of from the branches that gave birth to it, only to return once again to the waiting soil.

It was a sunny afternoon, clear of any clouds and only clear unblemished blue, a good time to enjoy a warm cup of tea yet there was no energy in his bones to even move from where he was.

He felt exhausted. Desultory even.

Gone were the halcyon days of the past, and now the present time of the vivid reality he had to face.

Morax, rex lapis, the geo archon. Names that weighted more than one could carry, memories that shackled his soul that lived for a thousand years on end, all but a stain that could never be washed away.

The breeze slowly danced in, playing with his hair softly, kissing his skin and welcoming him. It carried a hint of aromatic essence only he would know belongs to.

You.

He tried to desperately recount the days after youve left the face of the earth and yet he could not remember or did his mind not allow him to as if he did, it would bring him terrible and heavy consequences for an answer, one sane mind would never want to know.

Sighing, he sat back and recalled back the memories of you instead. When you were alive, warm and breathing in his arms. He remembers the way your eyes would shine brightly whenever he would be around, or the small sound of delight you would make when you have finished another one of the many interesting blends of tea youve done over the course of a week of mixing different flowers and tea leaves. Youve made up quite the fortune with this as your little hobby bloomed into a fully run business known across teyvat.

"Zhongli." he froze, youve never called him by his name ever since youve started getting close, it made him feal uneasy as he turned to look at you who stood by the doorway, a neutral look on your face.

"y-yes?" nervousness clawed at him as he racked his brain to what he couldve done for you to call his name like that, he couldnt think of any.

"I came back from the market and I heard youve made quite the generous payment. Why is that, I wonder?" he's done it again, that spending habit of his

"The price was reasonable for such a fine ceramic tea set, I dont seem to find why it shouldnt reflect its quality?" you sighed as you pointed towards the glass cupboard behind him

"You bought the same exact set a week ago, Zhongli. Thats why." having to realize his mistake after looking over the two identical set that on the shelf, he turned to apologize but only to see you missing from the doorway. Footsteps can be heard from the floorboards above him. You were upset.

After minutes of pacing in the living room, he finally mustered the courage to climb the stairs and enter your shared bedroom. A figure already under the sheets as the warm glow of the lamp illuminated your delicate features. The mattress sunk as he sat beside you, fingers brushing away the stray hair that fell on your face.

"Im still mad at you Zhongli." his hand flinched slightly at the way you called him

"I apologize. I seem to not have learned my lesson again. I would gladly return the set tomorrow."

"Its no use, they dont accept refunds." you replied without sparing a glance at him

"What can I do for you to forgive me then?"

"Just go to sleep, Zhongli." groaning you reached for the switch to shut the lamp off but a gentle grip stopped you, forcing you to look at his gloomy expression. Perhaps you went too far this time.

"Please stop calling me in that way. I dont like it." he whispers, drawing your palm to his lips, leaving small kisses upon it. He sure does know his way around your heart, no wonder why you could not stay mad at him.

"Just be mindful next time." you cursed yourself for being weak to his charms.

"I will." yet something was missing "Then can you call me as you did before?"

"Zhongli?" you could see the slight grimace in his face as you teased him

"Stop it." he kissed you without warning "Call me as you did before."

However, his lips didnt stop as they began to travel. From your cheeks to you forehead and then to your neck. Oh dear, he wasnt having any of your teasing.

"A-li." you giggled beneath him as he finally stopped and met your gaze

"Thats better."

He still remembers the faint smile that graced your lips whenever he would wake up next to you tangled in the same sheets. The softness of your skin on his calloused touch. Your lips melting his and your voice lulling his raging mind to peace.

Then everything changed when you drew blood that spilled from those lips he's kissed for a thousand times, painting a morbid image on the sheets. Anger and despair boiled inside of him once he learned of the secret youve kept. Zhongli was a calm and collected man all of the time except when he was with you.

Having to witness him at such a point felt as if his own spear was being driven right through his very chest. He held you in an arms width away, the panic and pain in his eyes increasing over the minute as he begged for you to explain why youve decided to lie about the flowers that bloomed in your lungs, the sickness youve inherited from your deceased mother, whose fate you soon would follow. You didnt want him to find out, not in this way.

He couldve done anything if he knew from the start but alas, you wanted to be cruel, thinking it was for the best. Until your symptoms persisted, a heavy reminder of the remaining distance of the string you have to walk on to reach the end. The heavy feeling in your chest started to worsen as cherry sweet liquid poured from your mouth.

Soon the once pristine sheets were stained in haunting crimson shades as you heaved and he watched in agony. If only he had the ability of what he once had back then, if only he could plant the seeds of the flowers from yours to his then he would, if only he hadnt met you one autumn evening

" please dont look at me like that. " you told him, cold hands caressing his cheeks, catching the streams of salty warm beads that fell freely from your darling's amber eyes.

"Im sorry. Im so sorry..." the last thing you wanted to see was this man to cry. The last thing you wanted to see was to see him relive the past tragic memories you promised to bring him out of

" my disease has nothing to do with you. In the end it was mine alone to handle. oh, you are far from that so please dont you ever blame yourself."

"How can I not? If I havent fallen so deep then you would experienced so much more in life, you couldve been happier if you met someone else. Yet you chose me and I couldnt give you anything, I--. " the words knotted up as he began to shake, hands holding yours as knuckles turned to white

You slapped him.

With all the strength youve gathered in that fading body of yours. The sound cutting the grieving sounds that spilled from him, soul and flesh alike.

"A-li, look at me. Do I look like someone whose unsatisfied with what youve given me? Did my smile ever fade when Im with you? Did your affections ever lack? Answer me." his watery gaze met yours, a torrent of emotions swimming in them

"No. Never." a soft smile was carved unto your lips

"My dear, youve given me all Ive ever wanted in this life and I regret nothing of it."

To him, you were the flower that bloomed at the highest peak of the mountain he's never reached and yet its petals voluntarily detached and fell down, making him the happiest as one thing he's admired was untouchable and now, lay softly in the palm of his hands. To cherish and to protect.

But of course, all things are evanescent.

The familiar feeling of soreness that wasnt supposed to be there rose, ebbed and flowed through his throat. He knew it all too well, it was after he woke from his week long slumber did he feel it along with what his ancient beating heart felt.

"You collapsed." the worried words of the qixing echoed in his head. He frantically got up but as soon as his feet touched the floor did his legs give out underneath him, what use was he in this sorry state. He was helped up and sat back on the edge of the bed.

He wanted to ask many things yet was unable to.

Ningguang spoke as if you were still breathing and was visiting her minutes ago with another one of your tea blends. "Dont worry and rest first, go to jueyun karst after. They will be waiting."

To where the adepti resides, who as well, favored you, that one soul among thousands of others. One to which they shared a few good memories with was allowed to slumber there in peace.

Zhongli found himself waking up to the sun setting in the horizon. Just like how youve gone and resurfaced back into his memories. It was time.

He stood up from where he sat, gloved hands brushing any dirt that clung to him as he made his way to where you slept.

The red bean that was planted by himself still remained, a token of his love for you. Picking one bead and placing it inside the hollow dice he brought along, completing another one of the similar handicraft he's made every visit.

The sun finally died and the moon began its reign. The small wisps of light gathered around before him, forming a blurry image.

It was then he felt at ease, he saw you smiling at him with all there is in the world. Your light seemed to dim a little, hinting the blessing the adepti gave was slowly diminishing. Soon your visits would cease and you were sure that by the end of the power spent, he wouldve let go of the torment that plagued him.

"A-li. Have you been well?" he knew what you meant

"Im letting go slowly my dear. Perhaps in time, I would learn breathe easily once again."

Longest yet lol. Hope yall liked it ehehe

[skeetlehand]

ghost!tommy au masterpost #2

ghost tommy au masterpost part one

I made another one. w hhh

au summary: tommy loses his final canon life during the explosion right after the pogtopia vs. manberg war

Nobody really knew where he’d gone either - Tommy had allegedly gone “missing” after the festival. In L’manberg, everyone figured that while it was odd, since tommy would usually be running down the Prime path shouting, or just being generally loud and annoying... he was just... missing. Nobody had seen him all week, but everyone had thought they were the singular individual who hadn’t seen him lately. Eventually when one of them asked where he’d been, everyone came to the consensus that they weren’t the only ones who hadn’t seen him. At first, they thought he was just grieving, since he spent the most time with wilbur. But then ghostbur shows up, which, while was a pretty sad/happy moment, it raised some sort of unease.... 

.... and then, ghost tommy shows up.

I put more details under the cut!!! enjoy pain yall

feel free to send asks about... well, anything! if you found something interesting here, share it! if you’ve got a completely unrelated idea, share it! i like to read your asks. I promise i’ll answer... eventually... (the five asks in my inbox @ me: 👀)

courtesy of @gheysnakelady and their great ideas 👀❤️(you have so many good ones!!!)

current table of contents:

ghost tommy’s appearance

relationships with the rest of the sbi

ghost tommy’s memories

other ghost tommy stuff (misc i guess)

a) presence 

b) connections 

c) blue/yellow 

d) body found

”””pranks”””

dreamon hunters...? (become basically bootleg ghostbusters. but just only one of them.)

TBC: to be touched upon in the next masterpost/page set

relationships with the rest of the smp

a) SAM SAM SAM BIG BROTHER SAM AAA; b) the cabinet + lmanberg... hhh tubbo n big q,,, fundy and niki,,, dream,, the badlands... i need ideAS

reactions to the reveal (at some point... big oof)

.... a revival? phil no -

1. Ghost!Tommy’s Appearance

(should... should I be calling him ghostinnit now? yall use that term a whole lot...)

before he meets anyone (excluding ghostbur and maybe philza. some others might’ve seen him lingering around certain places, faintly), he looked simultaneously exactly as he did before he died, overlaid by his prior deaths (an sword/axe(?) to the back when trying to escape dream during eret’s betrayal, an arrow wound that goes in deep, and currently, visible blast marks and the wither effect). He hadn’t figured out what he looked like yet, other than the noticeable vision problems, but when he did, he did his best to change his form (it’s my current theory that ghosts look like what they want to look like - ie. ghostbur’s nice yellow sweater being a choice on his end). It’s an effort, to look “okay”, and when he goes off the rails, there are hints to what he looks like. 

it’s mostly because... Tommy remembers his death vicariously.  All of them. This is not a good thing.

when he does meet people, his form is slightly transparent, but he looks almost normal. there’s that new hairstyle, which really isn’t a stylistic choice on my end ;’] ... there is a lot of sooty(?) grey patches on his sleeves, and a large black mark smack dab in the middle his shirt. The wither markings on his hands aren’t clear, but that they are there is visible. He hates the wither effects the most - no matter what he does, how hard he concentrates, they. don’t. go. away.

He’s got hair over his eye, like wilbur. Gets uncomfortable when it’s joked about, because that’s a part of his face that’s.... yknow.... and he can’t hide it otherwise

Since ghost!tommy is more emotionally gripped than ghostbur is, unable to let go of the past and all the memories + emotions from it (while ghostbur lets go of it Very Easily), his form shifts a lot. Not only to his “death form” (all of his canon deaths on one ‘current’ form), but to that of the different arcs - dirty long sleeves for pogtopia (it’s cold in the ravines, and he don’t got a coat), ripped revolutionary outfit (eret’s betrayal and the arrow both happened here)... and during his more mellower moments, a green bandana that goes around the neck. He’s constantly changing in clarity, too. It’s hard to focus on him at times.

2. Relationships with the SBI found family gang: pain

did you really think we could have nice things in this au? if so... ouch

Phil

tommy did see him sort of as a dad/some sort of older figure to come to for help. but phil has a history of not exactly being a Dad. sure, he basically adopted techno, and wilbur definitely saw him as a dad, but for tommy, it’s an unspoken relationship that they should be like that, that phil should have his back, that tommy can ask phil for help. yet, they don’t. Phil showed up way too late in the game to make an effort on all of the impacts the wars and pogtopia and wilbur have created, and maybe tommy resents him a little, for leaving him and his brothers alone on the server. maybe tommy saw wilbur die by philza’s hands, moments before he did the same point is, tommy was never a “difficult child” persay, he made all of his complaints loud and clear. philza didn’t expect to do any “underneath the underneath” with him... and didn’t feel like tommy needed the attention all that much, since he could basically occupy himself. 

Think of it like this, at least in my au, that phil was never meant to be a dad. He just chose to be some sort of strong figure in the boys’ lives (found family!!!!) - but he was a survivor first and foremost, and sometimes it shows. His habits rubbed off on his boys, and that shows too - him avoiding talking about Big Things with ghost tommy is reminiscent of how ghostbur dances around questions, and being pressured into doing things is reminiscent of techno.

Tommy, on the other hand, felt as if phil always favored techno, and if not techno, then wilbur, over him. it’s okay though! he doesn’t need phil, he’s a Big Man™! Look at him... dealing with... a war... exile... funky brother problems... more war... okay maybe if phil showed up sooner things would’ve been better but he didn’t so tommy had to be the bigger man! that’s... that’s okay...? hmm. okay maybe he’s mad at phil a little bit,,,,

techno

ahh, complicated relationships *rubs hands*. 

tommy was proud of his brother, at first, the way only little brothers can be, bragging about their cooler bigger bro - that, and tommy lowkey thought there’d be someone to help him with wilbur’s decline. haha NOPE. techno don’t do emotional. thanks,,,,,

on the other hand, all ghost tommy can remember is techno being the unspoken favorite, the favorite child, the favorite brother, teasing and feelings of inadequacy (techno wasn’t a bad brother, though... just... better). And then…he remembers techno showing up well into wilbur’s long decline, techno’s silence when he could’ve used someone to speak up for him, techno’s passiveness towards the paranoia, techno’s stoicism when all tommy wanted was someone to be strong, someone else to be the better man. instead, the job was left to him. why was it always left to him? he wasn’t supposed to do all of this, right?

Techno doesn’t feel all too bad about it, before tommy’s death is discovered. He thinks that the impact of the statement was made through humiliation and violence enough (tommy being pinned down, the hero speech, the ruined victory, etc). What did tommy expect, using the Blade like that? honestly, techno’s a little offended, that tommy thought he could use his brother that easily, like some weapon made of more skill than any of them know what to do with. Techno had made his opinions very clear on government, and then they go on to appoint another one? (even though, it was sort of clear that the goal was to “go back” to the old lmanberg, government and all) so tommy kinda had it coming. besides, he’d respawn and they’d go back to normal.

but then wilbur dies, permanently, and techno has to watch his brother come undone into something else barely reminiscent of what he was momnents ago... ghostbur barely even resembles the wilbur techno used to remember. death matters, on this server, which is two blows in themselves that techno will have to deal with. and then... tommy doesn’t respawn.

techno was sure he’d seen tommy around lmanberg. albeit, like, kinda quiet, but maybe the kid was going through rough times since wilbur died. it wasn’t like techno was going to talk to him about it or anything, since his presence probably wouldn’t be welcomed anyway. tommy was kind of immature, in that regard - he’d be really annoying and yell, like he always did when something didn’t go his way. that, and he wasn’t exactly welcome in lmanberg anymore...

besides, if tommy had a problem, he’d make it clear himself, right?

wilbur/ghostbur

There’s a lot tommy isn’t willing to talk, about wilbur. What could he even say? more than half of the things he did, challenges he stepped up to, were to make Wilbur proud (as he remembered him). He hated losing, because he liked winning more, sure, but also because he wanted to make wilbur proud of him. See: the bow duel, giving up his disc for freedom.

but pogtopia wilbur, well... things only got worse. sometimes, things looked a little better, but over time, tommy learned to expect what came after. even with techno there, tommy was always left to be the “bigger man” - in the aftermath of the festival, the pit, the final pet war - no matter how much he lost, it was always him having to move forward from that point. nobody really helped. it was just tommy and wilbur, and the sound of silence in the ravine.

tommy saw the final explosion of lmanberg as both the ultimate betrayal (the worst thing wilbur could’ve done, couldn’t he have waited, phil was here, surely phil couldve done what tommy spent months trying to do, what techno wouldn’t do, why couldn’t wilbur have this?) but at the same time, he... figured wilbur would pull sometime like this. at this point, the victory might’ve lightened his spirits a whole lot, but he spent months with wilbur alone and in the course of the preparatory week, wilbur didn’t miraculously get better. tommy wishes he did, and he can wish all he wants, but deep down, he knows that he didn’t. the others might’ve not noticed, since they weren’t there for that long.

as for ghostbur, it’s... awkward. 

With ghostbur, he’s stuck between wanting to reach out to his big brother and stay away due to alivebur’s memory living in constant loop in his head. Sad as it is to say, he was sort of… relieved, when ghostbur revealed the extent of his memory loss. after that point..  if ghostbur remembers all the happy bits of their time on the server, surely he could help fill in the gaps? 

Ghostbur was kind of the first person he saw when he resurfaced, and ghostbur then couldn’t really understand the gravity of the situation, nor who tommy was because of how he acted and looked before. tommy didn’t approach him either, mostly out of fear and anticipation. (he couldn’t imagine this of all things, being stuck with wilbur for all of his undying days, hadn’t he had enough?) 

At first, it’s awkward. He doesn’t know what to say, or when to say things, and he’s a lot quieter than in life, so it’s noticeable. He meets Ghostbur, who greets him with joy, until he realizes that Tommy is dead. Memories of the manberg v pogtopia war arise, and he flees. He does not come back, because looking at Tommy hurts. tommy doesn’t get it, really... but.....

and every moment after that, the way ghostbur looks at him, with the guilt in his eyes, the way that he looks away, unable to bear looking anymore… well, tommy is starting to think ghostbur remembers a lot more than what he’s willing to let on (he’s afraid he is). If wilbur doesn’t like him, that’s not… that’s nothing new, anyway. it’s probably one of the few things that didn’t change.

3. Ghost Tommy’s Memories

Going by the HC that they’re caused by how you feel when you die. ie. Wilbur dies happy because he is relieved by Phil stabbing him. That he can rest, while Tommy gets the opposite. Wanting to live but having it so cruelly taken by a loved one that you trusted, only feeling pain and betrayal and the feelings when they had while dying is the reason why they only hold certain memories.

Basically: like Wilbur, only remembers memories associated with a type of feeling. However, unlike Wilbur, Tommy only remembers the bad things.

Ghostbur suggested to phil, who in turn, suggested to tommy that he recorded his memories in a book, like he did! thus, tommy’s “What I remember” book: which is full of stuff he just wants to remember

Dream Good Times (this is just a lie, haha... but refers to the time (read: blank space) before the first disk war)

jokes! (when you make fun of someone, even in good jest, it’s possible they won’t take it that way themselves.)

My home (because it’s been griefed and destroyed so many times at this point)

The disks (not what they sound like though, just that they were apparently important, that he fought for them. he can’t remember what they sound like)

My pets (pet wars. can’t remember whose pet was whose. he remembers mars, though. he talked to mars a lot, on days that pogtopia was quiet... empty...)

the duel

Winning the war (trading the disks for freedom)

L’manberg (manberg)

… Tubbo (? ...dying at the festival.)

Techno & Wilbur  (and phil, and what they did to him, and what they didn’t do.)

pogtopia hanging out with friends (there was nothing good about pogtopia, so he crossed it off and wrote the most blandest happy thing he could replace it with. he wishes pogtopia was just that)

the pit

winning the war (the victory, the explosion his death. if you ask why he wrote it twice, he just.. hesitates. “we won, right?” you might nod along, assuming his memory was just being faulty, that all he could remember were the two victories, that like wilbur, nothing beyond the election/exile registered... but you could also note that neither of those “victories” really felt like winning, in the end. consider the cost...)

i have a secret second list for his “actual memories”. i call it “the list of grievances”. i am so clever haha

4. other ghost tommy stuff

since ghostbur had to go and add some stuff to ghost Lore™, i guess ghost tommy now melts in the rain and snow. not that he really... cares...

other things! these are ideas, idk...

1. presence

maybe whenever he gets near someone, the temperature drops and people feel overwhelmingly negative emotions (ie. sadness, pain, anger, guilt, etc). the intensity of the sadness effect depends on the person or if the person is near - the more that person had done, the more they felt.

Wilbur just feels like melancholy. nobody really notices, since it’s .... well.

2. connections to things?

maybe he’ll be found at certain locations, like his house/jukebox, the election podium, pogtopia, etc, etc... just, ghosting...

4. maybe he’s not actually dead

3. have some blue .... or yellow

either:

a) ghostbur gives tommy some blue to hand out, trying to be nicer to him anyway, like “give people this, it makes people happier if you give them something to drain the sadness”!! but when tommy tries to hand it out, it’s already fully blue. If asked if it was supposed to be transparent, or why it’s already blue, or etc, he responds with “no it's always been blue for me!” because when he’s given it, it turns blue instantly. maybe he seems little sad it doesn’t work on him, but it must be because he’s a ghost, right?

or

b) maybe he makes yellow that gives people happiness (it turns transparent as it’s used), but when he holds it it stays yellow.... because really all it does is draw up previous feelings of contentment, but... can't feel happy if you've never felt it before :’]

4. his body discovery

his body can be found where it was last... left. since he didn’t respawn.

They find him while cleaning up the rest of the rubble. and it's evident how he died, because there are wither marks, explosion burns, and... a final injury that must’ve been the killing blow, since there’s no way he would’ve survived that. it's evident he suffered, but not from the killing blow. his face has that... expression. he looks as miserable as his ghost does, at times (contrary to wilbur's exact opposite). maybe techno is there. they're not sure if tommy just got caught in the crossfire. they think he did, because he was buried under all of this. who would have ... intentionally done this to him...? while he was trapped?

maybe techno approaches to see what everyone looks so wicked out by. and he sees his brother or more like, what was left of his brother. oof.

5. Pranks: completely out of chronological order i guess... BUT I WANTED TO INCLUDE IT AAA

tommy isn’t... peaceful. he’s not at peace. he’s surrounded by the people who he can remember taunting him, hurting him, betraying him, all he can remember feeling is anger, grief and resentment - how long do you think he’ll play nice for? even though he wants things to go back to normal, either he feels like he’s much too dead for anything to ever be the same, and/or everyone ... moved on pretty quick, huh.

tommy begins to prank the server, like he used to. but there’s a pattern to it, and it quickly devolves from seemingly light-hearted to borderline malicious and definitely inconveniencing/annoying.

ghost tommy filling dream's current base/go-to-residency (since this man canonically homeless) with clay... and then, later, other blocks, like tnt, obsidian... 

he sets up multiple jukeboxes when dream goes to sleep and have them all play cat/melohi at different intervals at once, kind of like. "you wanted this so bad, now eat it”.

misplace sapnap's current pets (if he has any). fill sapnap's house with horses, cows all named "h" names, and eventually turn it into an elaborate aquarium filled with tropical fish.

George’s house gets scrambled: like the blocks all get swapped and stuff, or replaced with lime wool/clay. maybe fill his house with alarm clocks or something? idk

He's hesitant about techno... so one of his earlier steps is: collaborate with sam with the horse maze (who sees it as a bonding activity! fun for the whole family!), but in the books, on the last page of all the books, he writes notes like "you know what you did" and stuff idk, i gotta come up with 8 of those. at the end, skeppy brings back the books and the hornse and techno's like haha i didn't write those books! and skeppy says, that makes sense! why would your write this... (he assumes the first few are threats, but then they reference techno in diff ways, so he gets confused), and then techno's like: wait what

maybe he probably releases all the horses n cows and other things techno’s got. or relocates them (cause he still cares about animals, he doesn't want to hurt them... he's not sapnap after all)

at first it's funny, normal. then it's annoying. and then it becomes worrying. it elevates in destructive tendencies, and also escalates in amount so people start going "tommy this is so annoying"-> exactly the reaction he wants, so he continues -> "this isn't funny anymore, tommy!" well, it never was supposed to be :)

....and they realize suddenly that none of it was meant to be a "prank" or a joke, tommy genuinely was trying to make their lives as hard as they did him.

ALSO EDIT: i bring you: dreamon hunters! part two! tubbo n fundy fight over what to do with ghost tommy, as tubbo doesn't think there's anything wrong with tommy (it’s his best friend, of course nothing’s wrong!), while fundy thinks he's a malicious poltergeist (with all the pranks.... that’s... that’s not tommy. tommy isn’t that spiteful... is he? )

[thoughts-of-the-unheard]

oh nothing in a book has ever made me as angry as fucking pissed off as i am now about the end of chain of iron and i have a lot to say on it (i have more to say on the last few chapters of chain of iron than i did on the entirety of the folk of the air series)

ill start with being glad lucie was able to raise jesse but definite reylo vibes there and im ignoring the end of that so watch me ignore if lucie dies ill be like yea ya know shes just,,, somewhere else but i hated how many secrets she kept from fucking everyone i mean she didnt tell a single person the whole truth of anything shes got secrets on top of secrets and thats not good but hey matthews drinking isnt good either and no one but the lucie and cordelia ever really say anything about that so theres that and im not counting james’ you dont love anyone as much as you love that bottle or w/e he said bc that wasnt talking to him to try to help and get him to stop drinking that was just a hit bc they were fighting and i hate that i hate that they were fighting bc they wouldnt have been if it wasnt for that fucking bracelet and which has caused so many fucking problems that i could cry in indignation bc its not its not fucking fair james spent the last what three years of his life in a fog not being able to feel and not being able to notice his parabatai slowly spiraling into a drunken depression from something thats not his fault at all i mean yes it is his fault that his mother took the potion but it is not his fault that the baby died thats no ones fault but whoever sold him the potion and yea he shouldnt have bought it in the first place but he was kid and he thought that was the only way he could get the truth and its unfair its fucking unfair and alistair god alistair he knows what he did in school was wrong but he saw it as the only way and now hes trying to make up for it and apologise and be a better fucking person and thomas sees that and thomas loves him for that and alistair wont let himself be loved and its not fair and anna oh anna talk about not letting yourself be loved she put on such a good front she did but she shouldnt have ariadne loves her and wants to be with her fully with her but anna has to understand the stigma of that and why ariadne cant come out yet hell thats still a problem today but we wont get into that because anna clearly loves ariadne but shes too afraid of getting hurt again and frankly she should just go for it i mean so what if you get hurt again at least youll finally feel something because i know she feels nothing for all those other girls i know theyre just replacements for ariadne and it isnt fair and speaking    of   replacements    fucking grace fuck grace but fucking grace just casually destroying james life listen i dont give a shit how she grew up i couldnt care less about how tatiana treated her and how scared she was of her because if shed just fucking helped then she wouldnt have to worry about a damn thing from tatiana i mean theres a number of things grace couldve done she couldve told the merry thieves everything and they couldve defeated belial like they are now and then no one would be around to help tatiana and grace couldve told anyone in the clave about all of tatianas shit and then they wouldnt have underestimated her and she wouldve been in a proper prison and thus unable to escape so damn easily and thus not fucking able to get to grace okay shes a fucking idiot and i hate her and i hate reading about her and im fucking disappointed in her for not taking the damn bracelet off okay i had very fucking low standards for her but i hoped she would take the bracelet off and at the very least i thought she could fucking not manipulate him further like god damn girl james is a much nicer and understanding person than i am and he would try to protect her from tatiana if he knew that grace was being threatened by her if grace took the bracelet off and told him the truth he would help her i fully believe that but since he had to find out on his own he was furious as he should be but i dont think he had to be nice to her when she showed up at the end there i mean i wouldve just yanked her in the house and started yelling at her right there fuck pretending his still under that enchantment fuck talking to her in private okay id chew her out in the entryway its not like cordelia doesnt need to know she fucking does and i think her finding out by overhearing james arguing with grace is actually a fantastic way to find out because she gets to hear everything all of what james feels and all of what grace did completely unfiltered not that james would try to hide it from her but hed definitely try to soften the blow and i just think she needs to hear the whole truth and AND i really fucking hate when characters overhear only part of something and assume the worst and run away its so common and i hate it so much and i hate how she ran to matthews because i knew it was going to happen and i knew matthew was in love with her and that it was already straining their bond because no one fucking realised that james was madly fucking in love with cordelia because of that fucking bracelet have i mentioned have i mentioned how much that bracelet pisses me off i dont think i have lets get into it so how james was unable to feel properly for three years and how his head was so foggy he was unable to think properly too and how because of that he missed matthew becoming a drunk and how the merry thieves look to james as their leader so if james isnt saying anything about it then there must not be anything to say and how james was already in love with cordelia before the bracelet and thats part of why grace couldnt control him and how he loved her for years how he was in love with her for years how no one knew this not even him because everyone thought he was in love with grace how cordelia was in love with him but thought he was in love with grace how cordelia got married to him knowing she was in love with him and thinking he was in love with someone else how she could tell he wanted her but thinking he just wanted her body and that he was still in love with grace how she’d rather have some of him than none of him at all how he picked out everything in their house with cordelia in mind how he remembered that she loves chess and she never thought he would how he learned a whole other language for her how he immediately checks on her after every battle how everyone, especially cordelia, just writes all this off as who knows what because he cant be in love with cordelia if hes in love with grace and hes obviously in love with grace how no one could ever notice there was something wrong because they were feeling the effects too how james was so in love with cordelia that that love unintentionally broke an enchantment made specifically for james by a Prince Of Hell one of the most powerful beings the entire species will ever meet and i think that covers the gracelet situation but i keep thinking of the scene where the bracelet cracks when grace first went to curzon street and kissed james and james’ mind literally thinking it was cordelia because who else would he be kissing and afterward grace saying ‘i dont know who you think you were kissing, james herondale, but it wasnt me’ and im like damn right bitch get fucked but back to cordelia running to matthews okay i know she didnt know matthew was in love with her so she wasnt doing anything wrong going to him but i kept thinking they were going to kiss or something because we all know matthews in love with her and there were a bunch of hints that cordelia might be attracted to matthew and she was upset about james and i just kept thinking something bad would happen and i was right but shit i didnt think id be like that i had no idea matthew was leaving for paris and even less of an idea that cordelia would join him and the thing is i cant even be mad i cant blame her i would probably do the same thing hell id probably ask to go with and im very proud of her for saying she’d go If matthew stops drinking i really appreicate that and i hope he gets better but the all those misses how james left the house only minutes after cordelia and arrived at matthews only minutes after they left and how he could see them at the train station could see them getting on the train and leaving and leaving him behind because his sister is missing and he shouldve ran and caught them and begged them to stay if not just to help find lucie because they both think of lucie as a sister and they absolutely wouldve stayed to help her and then there would be the chance for james to explain the gracelet situation and everything would be fine it would fine eventually and everything would be okay but NO and ive said a lot but i havent even mentioned cordelia being a paladin for fucking lilith yet where did that come from i was not expecting that ill tell ya see i thought it was odd that wayland the smith would still be alive and that it wasnt mentioned in any of the other books and i thought it was odd that some apparently god-like blacksmith would be wearing such an elegant jeweled necklace and i thought it was odd that magnus would be back from the spiral labyrinth for just a day and would be staying with hypatia instead of ya know his own place but shit id never have put it together as one person let alone lilith and i cant say it came out of nowhere because it said that edom used to be liliths so it would make sense that she would want belial gone so she could have it back but still that was unexpected but im not disappointed i mean im obviously upset that cordelia is now pledged to the mother of demons and feels like she cant even touch a weapon speaking of which what did she do with cortana where did she put it she said she dealt with it which makes me nervous but we know she couldnt have broken it or anything a) because i dont think she physically can and b) emma has cortana later but i think cordelia should keep cortana close since its the only thing that can mortally would belial and apparently he only needs one more before something happens im guessing before hes like gone gone so she definitely needs cortana and lilith wants her to kill belial so i think she should and if shes stuck as liliths paladin after that and never wants to touch a weapon again so be it but get rid of belial first ya know anyway i think there was something else i wanted to say but i cant remember so if you read all of this holy shit im sorry thats a lot i hope it was entertaining at least and i hope i didnt also get you pissed off

[idjitlili]

I see stars

summary:

Imagine getting drunk at the feast of starlight , and becoming over happy,and dancing like the complete opposite to what elves are used to. Leasts just say Thranduil is more than impressed.

translations:

rukhs shirumund caragu=beardless orc dung

warnings:two boners

wordcount:2356

After the dwarves and you were taken prisoner,Thranduil had kept you with him once he sent Thorin to the cells for refusing his offer. Before he was even able to begin to talk to you the dwarves had escaped,theu had left a note which the guards handed to Thranduil ,who read it before passing it to you. His face was unreadable you didnt know what to expect,as the scrap paper was upon your hands. The rushed note had read:

"Our friend from strange lands,

your journey ends here, come vist us in erebor once it IS safe,not now,we  cannot afford to lose anymore family.

much love,

ps Thorin says if you get the chance near that rukhs shirumund caragu lowers,bite it off."

Your face lit up with embarrassment,knowing Thranduil had known what Thorin was implying for you to do,it was a good idea,but hiding a knife in your vagina and then chopping it off with that. That seemed like a better idea,what if you had his coxk in your mouth,and you bite it off and then you choke to death on it,it happened to dean winchester just with a sausage. You looked up to the king ,you was watching you intensely. "Thank you." you had spoke quietly,folding the note placing it in your front pocket of your jeans.

Yes you were still wearing your clothes from home,you had cleaned them last at a stream,but when you had first joined the company ,they had given you spar tunics , blankets and such. You had known them since you fell froma portal ,four feet from the ground infront of the company. They had grew to think very fondely of you ,and protected you from all danger.Now you felt very insecure with out them around ,especially when this king seemed very scary.

"what for?" Thranduil had questioned you circling ,your body ,you had crossed your arms and faced the floor. "for allowing me to have that note from my friends." he had stopped circling to look at you ,he liked you not like that at least not yet,you were being held captive yet you were treating him with kindness.

He hadnt kept you in a cell,infact he given you a room,it was locked at night and such incase you tried to kill him. In a few days you had warmed up to the king,but now erebor was reclaimed and he qould be going to reclaim his jems. You had practially begged him to take you with,so you could see your friends. He didnt like the idea,but then you started crying,you enjoyed the kings comapny when you would eat with him and such ,but you couldnt not go especially if you could prevent somes death. In the end he had agreed and sat you infront of him on his elk,you were excited to see your friends ,you just hoped Thranduil wouldnt kill them. You had been shy with Thranduil at first ,but you soon found out he was very nice,and you came out of your shell.

That led you to be literally bouncing on the elk once you had arrived infront of erebor  ,with Thranduil having to have his arm around your waist,which led you to be very close to each other.  He had to tell you to stop,as nice as he could,you hadnt realised you had caused the king a little problem.Which luckily his outfit hid,he didnt tell you that was why,he had just stated someobe might aim for him and then hit you with an arrow. Bouncing looked like yeah.  You had spotted Thorin whos gaze lingled on you ,he thought Thranduil was using you so they wouldnt try kill him.

However you smiled widely up at Thorin. " Thorin! Your crown looks very lovely on you!" you had shouted up at the king ,who sffered from dragon sickness,his mouth twitched slightly before turning back into a frown. "You are fooling around with an elf?and an elf thats him?" he had scoffed in disgust at you,your face fell. "no,thorin." you had been hurt at his words,thranduil had tighted his grip on you waist,protectively.

Once you had found out that Thorin and his best fighters had been led into a trapped ,you had forced Thranduil, totake you there and help save them. In which had surprisingly did,you also may have used your sons also heading there ,what if he gets hurt and you couldve saved him. You ended up jumping on azog's back ,legs around his waist stabbing him in the back with daggers,so thorin could go for the kill;you literally looked like drax. Now your life was complete ,you looked awesome,you had also saved fili and kili. Darn Fili deserves more screentime. Azog had flipped you over his shoulders ,slamming you into the ice,strangling you with one hand and blade in another sending a slice up your arm, You had just became loki ,being slammed by hulk,and now you needed stitches. "I...c-can...see..y-your cock." you had to try to speak,face red,unable to breathe.giving Thorin the chance to end his life.

Thorin pushed azogs body away from you,pulling you into his arms. "you are very much crazy ,y/n and for that I will be forever in debt to you as you saved my family and I" he spoke stroking your hair, as you gained your breath back,your neck was definitely was going to be bruised. "I ...r-repaid..my debt for keeping me safe in this strange world all those month,plus i got to see that majestic hair everyday." you reached your hand up,to his hair,running your fingers through it, "i am really sorry for saying what i did earlier, I do not want you getting hurt that was all." he spoke sincerely to you. "dont worry little man,no one has taken my innocence." you smirked in which Thorin smiled at you in relief  before carrying you bridal style to erebor to find oin,trying to avoid hurting your bleeding upper arm.

That was until Thranduil stopped him on his elk,his eyes wondering over your injured form,you smiled at the king. Thranduil knew he had to take you home with him,he had felt things he had never felt before ,even with his now dead wife. "let me take her back with me,to the woodland relm,we have the finest doctors." he had spoken sternly,Thorin had scoffed in response. "oin is the best in erebor!" he had growled,he didnt want you with an elf at all. "more like the only one." Thranduil had annoyed Thorin with this,his stomach bubbled with anger.  "Thorin, its fine I have to go back anyways ,I left belongings there." you tried to convince the dwarven king,however he was stubborn,so it would take more than that. "i will buy and have you made new belongings." he really didnt want you to go,he felt like it was his duty to protect you,he thought of you as a daughter almost.

"Thorin , I will come back,and if not straight away, I will write." you had jumped down from Thorins arms ,before hugging him tightly,and pulling away. Your eyes watered ,as you looked at back at Thorin who's did the same ,as Thranduil lifted you up onto his elk infront of him.

Also you forgot to mention,Tauriel fell off a cliff , rip. Legolas was going away for a while,but promised his father he would try to visit on the feast of starlight. Thranduil had comforted you saying Thorin was safe ,there wasnt any huge chances that something could happen to him while you were gone,you would be able to see him again. Anyways that was many months ago and you wrote to the dwarves and bilbo often,Thranduil would even get elves with drawing talents to draw you so you could send them back for Thorin and Bilbo. Bilbo had requested it. But tonight was the feast of starlight,Thranduil had you a dress made ,and fitted , it was mint green,come to think of it looked exactly like Arwen's dress in return of the time. Maybe you become friends with her tonight ,and gift it too her in the future as she loved it so much. wink wink. Thranduil had personally came to chambers,and walked with you to the feast. Yeah so you had been staying in the woodland relm way longer than you had thought you would have been staying.

Thrandul had sat on the end of the table ,while you sat at the side of the table next to him,there was many high elves at the table such as celeborn,Elrond,Lady Galadriel,and many others,you could barely remember any of there names. However there had been wine,you were barely an adult ,let they kept topping up your glass ,no one told you how strong elvish wine was. You were tipsy very quickly,you didnt make much conversation with anyone as you very nervous of saying something innappropriate. Soon as you all had entered the hall ,the music filled your ears it was quiet boring music. So you just lingled around Thranduil , drinking wine ,which was everywhere ,soon you were very loose  ,and very close to Thranduil. Basically jumping around him, that was until a slightlly up beat song started playing. "Thranduil I am going to go danceeeeee." you had spoke excitely ,gripping the kings arm he had simply nodded.

You had skipped off to the dance floor,letting out a "wooooooo" hitting your fist in the air,Thranduil watched you as you tucked a part of your dress into your short legging shorts,he had gasped at your action as your whole thigh was revealed. You began dancing like you were doing just dance to umbrella,singing the lyrics,pointing to Thranduil ,gesturing him to join he shook his head,you shrug at him. You had learnt this not only because of tom holland but as a child you loved just dance and memorized the movements.

"you have my heart

And we'll never be worlds apart

Maybe in magazines

But you'll still be my star

Baby, 'cause in the dark

You can't see shiny cars

And that's when you need me there

With you, I'll always share"

you had began,as the elves had changed the music to suit the music , you smirked at heart you had gestured to Thranduil,who's face was a beet,he couldnt deny he liked it.

"When the sun shine, we shine together

Told you I'll be here forever

Said I'll always be your friend

Took an oath, I'ma stick it out to the end

Now that it's raining more than ever

Know that we'll still have each other

You can stand under my umbrella

You can stand under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh

Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh

Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh"

you gestured under your dress before ,winking at Thranduil,before pulling the dress off swiftly,causing the elves to gasp ,leaving you in a tight black corset from Thorin and black shorts,you threw the dress at Arwen mouthing keep it.These fancy things

"Will never come in between

You're part of my entity

Here for infinity

When the war has took its part

When the world has dealt its cards

If the hand is hard

Together we'll mend your heart."

You strut over Thorin ,high and might ,getting very close ,before turing and dropping your ass slightly grazes him ,before flicking a leg out then bring it back in and doing the same with the other. Before standing up quickly,facing him wipping the back of your hands down his face before going back the dance floor.

"When the sun shine, we shine together

Told you I'll be here forever

Said I'll always be your friend

Took an oath, I'ma stick it out to the end

Now that it's raining more than ever

Know that we'll still have each other

You can stand under my umbrella

You can stand under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh

Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh

Under my umbrella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh"

Thranduil stares at you,licking his lips at your performance,he was deeply attracted to you there was no doubt about that. You skin glittering in the light as it reflected onto your sweat,

"It's rainin', rainin'

Ooh, baby, it's rainin', rainin'

Baby, come here to me

Come into me

It's rainin', rainin'

Ooh, baby, it's rainin', rainin'"

you finished off ,voice hurting slightly,before grabbing a glass of wine chugging it,bow at the elves that claped for you, smiled brightly,they hadnt seen anything like that ever. You didnt get to anything else before Thranduil practically run at you. You had revealed you love Thranduil ,in your song, He cupped your cheeks gently with his large hands before he pressed his soft lips against yours ,the elves around you clap  around you,as you both kiss passionately.

"will you marry me,y/n?" he spoke once you both pulled away,you nod eagarly before pressing your lips to his quickly,you bow once more before pulling out of the hall,he thanks everyone for coming as you walk out.

lets just say you dont bite his cock off,you went to visit Thorin with Thranduil the next day , they put aside their differences for you ,as Thranduil tells them about your stunt ,not about the boner he hid when you slut dropped infront of him.

[patchdotexe]

explorers of arvus: heading back / 3.11.21

zoom and enhonse

LAST TIME ON ARVUS taure passed out and we are now down a healer! also we met a disciple of halvkar, and surprisingly did not murder her. this is fine. we have instantly gotten distracted by our various carts. cats. our various cats

DID ANY OF US CATCH TAURE, SHE FELL OVER sieron tried to catch her and smacked charlie+thorne in the face (he rolled a nat1, f) BUT the catboy is to the rescue bc silje is the designated Not Incompetent of the group today

CONSULT THE CHILD hewwo yrel yrel: her mind is being consumed by the serpent of nightmares. :D charlie: HELLO?????//

so, dendar(?) the night serpent is imprisoned beneath arvus! she was formed from the nightmares of the first sentient being, and sometimes she eats people's nightmares. if she's exceptionally hungry, she'll force nightmares onto people for her to feed off their fear. yrel thinks taure will Probably wake up. there's a thing on arvus mentioned by the locals called a "sleeping sickness" where people will fall asleep for a few days, sometimes longer, but will wake up. its magical in cause, the people afflicted by it have horrific nightmares, and its just kinda. a thing. wowza

(i have gone back to spelling yrel's name as yrel bc i think it looks nice)

OH HEY SOMEONE POSTED A THEORY ON ONE OF MY STICKMOLUS ANIMATIONS man i should get back to stickmolus sometime. once dsmp releases its awful grip on me.

i keep getting distracted by seeing myself in the camera preview. i have a tooth gap! what the fuck its cute?? K I KNOW WE'RE SUPER BLURRY IN FRONT RN BUT PLEASE HELP ME STAY FOCUSED I SWEAR -leo

we're gonna build a sled! to put taure on. thorne: i have a good strength score. ....i say, out loud charlie: i am four feet tall. [cue argument between thorne & sieron about them both being horcs but sieron has a +0 bc strength is his dump stat] OH, OKAY, THORNE ROLLED A NAT20 TO CARRY TAURE. NICE

[discussion about what to tell everyone at camp vengenace] thorne: the last thing we need to do is a witch hunt charlie: --and we already hunted the witch! the witch has been hunted.

time to discuss strategy! we need to figure out how to head back to camp vengeance, eg if we want to follow the path we already took or if we wanna do some trailblazing. looks like we're gonna try and take the most direct path! which means we'll prolly risk tangoing with some undead but im willing to risk it TINY HUT STAIRCASE sorry i just remember it now and then

nyx: [meowing at his cats] thorne: uh... why is silje meowing? jorb: silje's food bowl is empty jorb: you look at silje's food bowl and there's a divot in the middle and the food is all on the sides emotionally, we must bully the catboy silje saw something interesting and started meowing

thorne: ill take first watch silje: ill also take first watch. charlie: [quietly] gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy (but, like, extended for 15 seconds)

silje: [takes watch] [rolls a nat1 and gets distracted by looking at his crush]

THORNE HAS LOCATED A DOG the dog does not give a shit about the tiny hut. THE DOG HAS PEED ON THE TINY HUT goodbye dog

EVERYONE IS ROLLING AT LEAST 1 NAT1 thorne: wow! that sure is a dog. thorne has drawn the worst possible dog. thorne has erased the worst possible dog. we dont speak of the worst possible dog its the dog version of honse. DONSE

sieron is now on watch! MAN we are havin trouble rolling today. at least kali's here to make sure sieron doesnt stare at a rock for 50000 years sieron sees a mouse! bottom text

charlie is now on watch! kali is havin a big ol thonk. nothing meaningful has come of this

i am perceiving some deer. sieron is not perceiving some deer. silje is perceiving some deer, but better the deer are fucked up and undead! silje has gone from "we should hunt these deer for food" to "we should hunt these deer for sport"

charlie: i do not feel like being jumped by five thousand skeletons

charlie takes first watch with sieron! WHY ARE OUR ROLLS SO TERRIBLE taure is super cursed right now. that's not very pog charlie: this place sucks. thorne: to be fair, we havent-- charlie: YOU'RE ASLEEP, SHUT UP

oh hey coolname galvanic finally partied. nice.

thorne is at watch! solar: hey, is leomund's tiny hut an orb? there's a critter digging around! AH, THE CRITTER IS UNDEAD. this could be a problem

solar: hey michael, how much does the horrific sin against god dog i drew look like this creature michael: [dice roll noises] about 50%.

michael: if anyone likes, they can make a nature check-- solar: ME MEMEMEMEME ME ME ME

its a bulette! aka a land shark. problem: they are not normally undead. this one is undead.

jorb: imagine if you could tame one of those and use it as a mount. leo: IT WOULD JUST DIG UNDERGROUND AND LEAVE YOU THERE

we are just calling it a weird dog

we're going to mail a letter to the heart of arvus. HEY, CHECK OUT THIS WEIRD DOG,

JORB FOUND ART OF A BABY BULETTE. WEIRD PUPPY!

solar: hey guys, check out this sick art of a bulette i found

silje kept a lookout for the weird dog but its just fucked off. goodbye, weird dog give it up for day 3!

man there's been like, three incinerations today in blaseball. what's up with that. I SWEAR IM MOSTLY PAYING ATTENTION its just been an eventful day in blaseball. also im wearing my garages bomber rn. jaylen is home wooOOOO the wind smells stinky. this is fine.

we're actively avoiding whatever combat michael keeps nudging at us bc we're carrying around an unconscious person and i SWEAR hes gonna throw something directly at us once he's done with our shenanigans

UHH MICHAEL ASKING FOR PASSIVE PERCEPTION LOL

huh. this place used to be inhabited? we're in the woods rn but there's some like, stone ruins? like, VERY ruins. like, not really any structures standing, but enough evidence to show there Were things. WE FOUND A STATUE charlie: i want to smash my face against the lore.

used to be a circle of standing stones, but most of em fell over or got overgrown. inside of the circle has been cleared, although v roughly-- ground's torn up statue is of fjolnir! warrior holding up a spear and shield. AH, THERE ARE CORPSES, a human got REAL fucked up here. one of the corpses is straight up impaled on fjolnir's spear. n ... not pog.

i am trying so, so hard to pay attention. but i also kinda wanna take a nap.

charlie: [stares at statue] [rolls a 4] i wonder if he had a dick.

okay so something rolled in, tore up the overgrowth inside the circle, and murdered a couple dudes. and was also super tall and human-adjacent. hrm.

oh my god why are we rolling so shit today. time to stealth away and hope we dont get casually dismembered

k: jorb's hair is so long... leo: K, PLEASE,

time for a break! i am very tired but im gonan see if i can push through a little further. nyx is petting his cat why do orangatangs look like that

first watch is thorne and sieron! have they even, like, talked thorne unhabby ): thorne's worried we were tresspassing when checking out the statue, meanwhile im thinking about that one time when sieron got bit by a groundhog

(oh my god this is from late 2018)

leomund's tiny hut, aka the anti-sea bear circle we are getting SO much mileage out of the tiny hut. SILJE HUMS A SONG WITH KALI cute........... FINALLY I HAVE ROLLED ABOVE A 14 wait no i rolled a 16 twice. anyway we are not dead

nearly at camp vengenace! boy howdy i hope camp vengeance didnt get burned down. AH FUCK TAURE IS UNCONSCIOUS SO WE CANT CAST FOR DETECT POISON kaepora nearly made us all shit ourselves but its okay he just saw some bison and thought it was cool Michael Is Consulting Several Tables

WHY DOES JORB'S CAMERA ZOOM LIKE THAT why am i hungry. i have so many questions

HEY, TALL GUY [smacks sieron]

camp vengeance looks better! like, nobody's Obviously Sick anymore, the medical tents arent overfilled, we did it! we saved the dayyyyyy time to report to ryder! taure's getting dropped off at the medical tent

man remember when charlie didnt wear pants

oh man, with taure unconscious charlie is now taking point with social interaction. wild. jk im making jorb do it bc im tired HAHA NAT 20 PERSUASION BC OF ME HELPIN SIERON man ryder is such a cock. he was totally ready to keep throwing troops at heaven's brazier to die until we managed to persuade him out of it. jorb: did we tell ryder about the vision? michael: you kinda just took a look at him and went STINKY BOY!

okay yeah anything that dies on arvus will just pop back up as undead. man, arvus sucks.

ryder: alright, dismissed. charlie: seeya, soldier boy! :D hahahahaha im gonna eat his knees.

SILJE NEEDS ENRICHMENT IN HIS ENCLOSURE

charlie: ive decided he sucks. silje: we've already arrived to that, you're late!

LMAO WE WALKED IN ON INGRID AND HER CRUSH they fuckin. nice. you go, you funky lesbian

jorb: we've got the tiny hut, we could go anywhere leo: we could go to SPACE! nyx: we could not go to space. leo: WITH A TINY HUT STAIRCASE, WE CAN,

we are 320 miles away from the spaceship that exists on arvus. nice.

michael: justin sees you-- roll a strength saving throw. leo: i cant wait to die! [rolls a 3] I AM CRUSHED BY MY DOG michael: he rolled a nat20.

BOSS ENCOUNTER: CHARLIE'S DOG (the small circle next to him is one of the medical tents.)

THORNE IS PACT OF THE GUN solar: PARRY THIS, YOU FUCKING CASUAL

sieron, to ingrid: seems like youve been doing well charlie: i punch sieron. sieron: sieron: the camp, of course.

man we have no idea if the heart of arvus is actually related to the prophecy or not. theres a Lot of stuff lining up, but not enough, and its hard to say how much of it couldve been literal?

solar & michael: [discussing exposition] me: [cracking up bc penn sent me a funny dsmp joke]

prophecies are weird.

charlie is just s she is just sitting here SILJE PLAYED CARDS REALLY GOOD AT ME nyx rolled a nat20 and took all my money

oh cool we can talk to yrel telepathically! time to hoist yrel. THIS IS SO SCUFFED thorne mentioned yrel and now we're trying to explain to ingrid that we have a magic talking snake charlie: I WANT TO GO HOME. thorne: we cant go, we have a GOD-KING to kill! "i think theyre insane, theyre talking to a snake" "ingrid, druids exist" "oh. im gonna go back to getting railed by my 7 foot tall girlfriend"

[wongiemei]

Roommate!Jeno

a/n: maybe i should just turn this blog into an nct dream one

okay

letsgetit!

first of all,

story time!

your uni is fucking expensive and it’s more expensive if you live in the grounds

so you being the wise human,

you went to get an apartment near the campus

it was great and all since roommate!jaemin was paying for his stuff

you were both living respectively until he had to leave

the dumbass didnt even bother to tell you

one morning you just woke up and found his note

‘hey bitch! figured you were too much of a rock to wake up but i moved out! the family wants me to go back home and tend the restaurant’

the whole day yesterday, you were working

bc,,, yknow

broke college life

and you just walked in half asleep towards your room and fell asleep

so you didnt really see or notice

but were you freaking out bc your roommate suddenly moved out?

ofc you were freaking out

not only was your roommate gone,

how were you going to find a new one?!

jaemin expected your phone call that afternoon and he endured through all your screaming

‘babe, i’m just going to be gone for a year-or two’

‘oR tWO?!’

‘hun, my dad’s injured and his back can only let him do so much. ma’s working too much and i dont have any siblings to help. i figured i could just hold off college until my parents are ready’

ugh, jaemin is such a family boy

‘but jaems! you couldnt have at least told me that yOu wERe mOvING OuT?! and! rent is due soon! i can’t pay for that myself!’

jaemin couldve easily told you to warn yoy

but he didn’t want to tell you bc he couldnt handle you sad and didnt want to upset you

however, now jaemin really understands how shitty that move was

‘tell you what. i’ll pay for this month and make a few phone calls and i’ll get you set up with a new roommate, deal?’

knowing how much of a social butterfly he was, you agreed

ofc you trusted jaemin but part of you feared that he might pair you up with a freak

but he’s not that mean, is he?

you can definitely see renjun doing that but not jaemin

so there you are,,

sitting on your couch alone

without jaemin, your apartment felt really empty

its been a few days since he moved and you were miserable

jaemin hasn’t even texted you about that potential roommate

just as you were about to call him,,

your doorbell rang

you froze and you looked at the time

it was nearing 11 at night and you don’t remember ordering delivery

see,,

if jaemin was here,

he would answer it for you since you would be too scared to do it

but you mustered up your courage and peeped through the peep hole

the man was dressed in all black with a black mask and a black cap with his hood over it with a black hoodie and black pants

ngl, you were terrified and trembling

he rang it again and you jumped

typing out a quick text to jaemin saying ‘hey bub, if i don’t text you in an hour, that means ive been kidnapped so call the police’

you grabbed a pan from the cupboard and gulped before you opened the door

thinking he would just walk forward and grab you, you closed your eyes and raised your pan over your head and swung

a shriek from in front of you made your eyes snap open and found the guy on the floor with a fetal position

you both just froze for like a phat minute

snapping back to reality, you held the pan in front of you

‘if youre going to kidnap me, i got a pan and im not afraid to hit you with it!’

you tried to sound intimidating but your voice was shaking so much

the guy stood up and he took off his hat and the mask to reveal a blonde haired kid

okay, so you were sHOokETh

damn! this boy is fine!

he gave you a shaky smile and held out his hand

‘hi! i’m lee jeno! you must be y/n? jaemin told me you had an opening for a roommate?’

now you noticed the two duffle bags at the side

the embaressment and the shame settled in slowly and you found yourself burning up

nodding, you motioned him to come in

jeno awkwardly walked in and was amazed at how big the layout was with the low rent

‘yea, its kinda hard to believe that we only pay that much. at first i thought there was a ghost in here and that’s why its so cheap’

you tried to make small conversation but laughed weirdly at jeno’s slightly terrified face

‘no! there really is not ghost here! ive lived here for a year and there hasnt been anything so please dont understand! please be my roommate!’

you begged and jeno thought you were weird

but jaemin was right, you were weirdly adorable in a way

so that’s how you and jeno became apartment buddies!

now onto the good stuff!

so, jeno is a vv clean guy

like he’s the type to just pick up a wrapper in the street and throw it in the garbage

so naturally, he likes to keep the apartment as tidy and neat as possible

but you being a mess you are,

you usually leave a lot of things everywhere

lets just say you have a short memory

‘oh? how did that get there?’

eventually, jeno gets sick of it and he confronts you with it

ofc you understand and you actually try to be better

since jeno is literally the most perfect roommate

maybe even better than jaemin

(but don’t tell him that)

jeno is the type to re-stock the pantry with snacks and the fridge with ice cream

since youre both college students, ramen is practically always available in the house 24/7

he also makes the coffee every morning since he works early and wakes up first

even though he doesn’t like the drink and prefers milk, he still notices how you survive off of coffee

babie likes to pick you up some iced americano while he gets a frappe

you on the other hand,,

you’re very surprised

when you got to bed after showing jeno around,

you messaged jaemin

ofc he was worried af and was blowing up your phone

‘WHAT?!’

‘bitch answer the damn phone!’

‘whatthe fuck is happening?!’

‘i need to know if you’re still alive!’

‘oh fuck i shouldnt have moved out’

smiling softly at how worried he was, you responded to him

‘you hoe, it hasnt been an hour yet so chillax. i’m alive, unfortunately, and i just met my new roommate. again, thanks for the heads-up. youre so bad at those. i literally thought he was a burgular or a kidnapper. but he seems chill and emo. just my type.’

but jeno is F A R from C H I L L

oh my goodness,,

hes a crackhead

theres this sound he makes when he’s confused and you couldnt figure out if its cute or weird or if he’s doing this on purpose or thats just how he is

you and him basically communicate with memes

sometimes, at the weird hours at night, he sends you a dumbass meme

you cant help but snort 

also, you promised to take jaemin out to dinner to repay him for the great roommate

‘hes literally one of the best people youll ever meet. it just so happen he needed a place to sleep. now you owe me’

hes a science major while you were a computer major

he basically brings home weird stuff to analyze and it just hella stinks

but hes considerate enough to actually put it outside

whenever he’s focused, he talks to himself or the thing he’s analyzing

‘okay mr. fishy. your scales are really big and its bigger than average’

its so cute

oof also!

jeno doesnt have a job yet he always makes rent on time with extra money to spare

he even sometimes buys you stuff saying, ‘they reminded me of you’

for your birthday, he bought you a pearl necklace that mustve costed thousands

at first, you thought he was a chaebol or smth

which you wouldve been vv jealous of bc youre a struggling college student who works at the coffee shop

but, you were answered when you caught him walking in half-dazed and half-asleep with cuts all over his face

it was like 2 in the morning and you were pulling an all-nighter for some project and wanted to get a glass of water

but here he is, hood up, lip busted, black eye, cheek cut

you shrieked and ushered him to sit on the dining chair

thinking he got mugged or something, you start drilling him questions

‘hun, if you were beat up, we need to call the police! this is illegal!’

but jeno chuckles and brushes the stray hairs out of your face as you tend to his lip

‘pls dont. if you do, ill be broke and i wont have money to pay rent then i cant be your roommate anymore’

cue confused y/n

‘wUT?’

‘if i dont make money, youll kick me out and youll have to find another roommate. i dont want you to go through that hassle again’

ofc you were flattered that even during this situation, hes still thinking about you

‘how is this making money?!’

‘i cant believe youre oblivious to so many things. i thought for sure youve caught on.’

more confusion

‘eXCUse mE, lEE JEno? since when have you started coming home with all these things in your face?’

you were worried that this wasnt the first time this happened

but if you think hard about it, thats why he always wears his mouth masks and he always has his blonde fringe down and sometimes wears sunglasses even though its cloudy outside

‘ohmygod lee jeno are you in a gang?!’

jeno was shocked that you came to that conclusion but laughed at how adorable you were rn

with your wide eyes and mouth open

‘nah, bro. i box. its the only way i can make easy money.’

‘but,,, why did you hide this from me? if you needed money i couldve helped you’

he looked at you skeptically

‘sis, you could barely afford that muffin the other day’

lee jeno now looked different from the jeno you met the first day

What you thought to be an innocent little squish was a fighter at night

‘yah, can-um-you need to take this off’

you mumbled while tugging on his sweatshirt

he nodded and slipped it off

he explained why he came late when he first moved

‘i had a late night match and yknow,, school and all, i barely had enough time to come'

as you dab the wound, you try to make small talk to distract yourself

 ‘so,, youve been boxing this whole time?’

you asked, trying not to get distracted to the way his tight shirt clung to him, showing his defined body

there were bruises up and down his arms and his knuckles were busted

‘yea. i have been since senior high. gotta make money, yknow?’

‘but jen, you can work in coffee shops or at local bookstores. its not worth seeing you busted up like this’

your lips trembled at the thought of him being beaten up too hard to the point he gets into a coma

jenos eyes widened at your wobbling lips and he softly cupped your face

‘hey, im okay and ill be fine. you dont have to worry about me. i usually win, anyways’

his confidence made you chuckle

‘i trust you, lee jeno. just make sure to make it home to me every night.’

‘i know you do and i will. always.”

ever since then,

youve become his little caretaker

youve informed jaemin of what hes been doing and he knew but didnt want you to judge him immediately

smh, jaemin really sucks at informing people

but jeno tries to help you keep up

he even sends you texts that hes fighting that night and your little ‘fighting!’ always makes him smile

his manager and friend, chenle, noticed that hes starting to smile more

chenle likes boxing and wants to be a part of it but doesnt want to be hurt

so,, what better to be the manager of his friend

‘yah, hyung. what’s got you giggly today?’

jeno pointed to the screen and giggled at the little good luck gif you sent

his eyes turned to crescents and chenle smirked

‘wah, you like her, don’t you?’

at the mention of ‘like’, his smile dropped and he shook his head

‘no. of course not. shes just a friend.’

chenle being chenle,,

he continues to prod

‘okay. so every night, you make it your priority to make sure you’re home by 2 in the morning for your friend’

smh, chenle youre so annoying

but hes so right

ever since you caught him,

hes been making sure he gets home at the same time 

he sends you a text that hes on his way and you set your ringtone at a very high volume so you wake up and take care of him

during fights, he makes it his sole mission to make out of this alive and a winner for you

but that never crossed his mind as his feelings for you

he just thought of it as making you not worry for him

but then, he starts to think about your stupid little habits

the way you make this face whenever you dont understand

or when you still leave little post-it notes everywhere with ideas you come up with

he noticed it all and he loves them

‘hOLy ShIT!’

that night was when he realized his feelings for you and he was so dedicated on finishing it that he quickly won and he dashed home with his money

bursting through the door, you looked at him with wide and startled eyes

‘what’s wrong?’

you came running but he scooped you up to a hug

ok you were confused but relieved that he was home and alright

jeno looked at your face and wanted to confess but chickened out at the sight of you

you were so good to him and honestly, he doesnt deserve you

(his thoughts, not mine)

‘i-i’

he stuttered and you motioned him to continue

‘i won!’

he shouted and you congratulated him, even though he literally won all the time

guiding him to the chair, you began to dab his cuts

(dab that bitch)

‘im starting to think that your opponents either really suck or youre like the god of boxing’

he didnt know how to take that but blushed red at the mention of him being a ‘god of boxing’

‘nah, im just good’

you eyed him and smiled

he continued to watch you heal him and inspected your face

heavy eyebags and sunken cheeks, it mustve been a long night

he felt a pang in his chest thinking that you push your stuff away just to help him

‘you dont have to keep doing this for me, yknow’

you halt and look at him seriously

‘i know i dont. but i cant sleep at night thinking youre in pain and alone when i can be there for you’

even though he just realized it, jeno was pretty sure he fell in love with you a long time ago

but if it was possible, he fell in love with you even more

‘thank you’

his soft voice filled the silence and you vowed that you will always be there for him whenever he needs help

a few days later, jeno hasnt been to a fight

sure you were worried at what was going on in his head but partly relieved that you dont have to see him so battered anymore

but this was so un-jeno

just as you were about to talk to him about it, he announces he got a job at the bookstore down the street

‘huh? i thought you didnt want to work’

you question while he looked sheepish

‘i realized that i was starting to become a burden since you take care of me every time. so i thought i should quit and get a regular job. besides, it doesnt hurt as much’

he laughed but you didnt react

‘lee jeno, you gave up boxing and the money,,, for me?’

he nervously looked up at you and you noticed the redness of his cheeks

‘i-well-if you put it that way’

‘listen to me, im flattered and i truly love that you dont want to get beaten up anymore. but i dont want you to quit something you like because of me'

‘but you always take care of me and push your priorities away to clean me up. i dont do anything in return and i dont think its fair!’

he argued and a soft smile crept up your face

‘yah, lee jeno'

your voice became a whisper

‘it doesnt matter to me if you dont do anything in return bc i dont see this as a favor. you are mine to take care of and i will do anything for you, you understand that?’

he looked at you in shock after hearing your response

he also turned red at the mention of him being yours

‘so-but-i dont think-'

he stutters but you place your hands on his arms making him stop

‘all i ask is you to come back home, to come back to me'

by now, yall were blushing

even though it might not sound like it,

but yall just indirectly confessed to each other

yall stared at the ground and jeno looks up, biting his lip

‘hey, y/n, can i make it up to you with some coffee?’

your head darted up and looked at him with wide eyes

‘like-like a date?’

it came out suddenly and you stepped back in surprise, cursing yourself

but jeno chuckled, eyes scrunching cutely

‘it'll be one of many'

lmao i didnt really like this but i made it at 2 in the morning and i kinda like boxer!jeno

[adcres]

         howdy hey , pardnerrrs :> i’m rox ( she / her ) ‘n i’ll be playing yr residential sullen broodin’ boy , nico . i didn’t have the time to write out a whole new intro , given that i have back to back classes again today :-’( , so please forgive me for recycling his old intro akawodkgrsd ; . that being said , i did tweak around some tingz and i updated his wcs for him , so if yr down to clown around just hmu on my discord :   𝔰𝔴𝔢𝔢𝔱 𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔪𝔫𝔦𝔞#2854 !  okie okie , i’ll shut da eff up now ♡ 

BASICS.

༉‧₊˚✧ kim taehyung , cis man , he / him / his — did you see that nicholas “nico” yoon was trending last night ? the twenty three year old street artist has been getting a lot of press lately . i think it’s due to them being so + quixotic & + free-spirited , but i always thought they seemed - withdrawn & - sybaritic . their fans always say they remind them of soft smoke rings spun in a dreamy haze , silver-ringed fingers rapping against polished oak , and waning light refracting against broken glass though . i wonder if they’ve found out about REDACTED yet … i guess we’ll have to wait and see . [ rox , 22 , pst , she / her , none ]

PINTEREST & PLAYLIST .

01 and 02 .

PERSONALITY .

at first glance , nico reads as this aloof , arrogant type that doesn’t like to associate w the common public . always keeping the majority of people at a comfortable distance , nico moves almost exclusively within his own social network , and doesn’t like to deviate from what he knows best .  

not so much pretentious as he is lazy , making an effort to socialize with complete strangers is simply something that nico would never do . hehe ... he’s kind of shy like that .... ♡ though he’d literally never admit it ♡

despite giving the impression that he’s some intimidating and chronically indifferent kind of guy , nico is genuinely a sweet boy — ‏‏‎ one who’s in a constant state of confusion as to why people seem to be so scared of him . it always comes as a shock when close friends of his admit that they thought he absolutely hated their guts when they first met him .

b/c tho he’s p smart , nico is very oblivious at times , and he’s 100% the kind of guy who’ll walk away from a conversation thinking he did a rly rly good job trying to make a friend ... when in reality he prob said four words in the span of thirty minutes smh .

overall , nico’s a private person , especially with what he’s thinking ... and it’s really hard to get a clear read on what’s on his mind . sharing his feelings has never been one of nico’s interests b/c he just genuinely doesn’t think whatever he has to say is rly worth mentioning . so he usually just shuts da fuck up n lets other ppl talk so he can mentally gain the strength to continue socializing .

push nico’s buttons enough tho ‘n you’ll catch this mf speaking in full sentences .

lastly , it should b noted that nico is a romantic through n through ... this mf probably d*ed in the victorian era ‘n got reincarnated b/c he’s got that ‘ lets share furtive glances across the room but never say a thing to each other  ‘ thing on lock . mr. darcy headass

and while nico might play the role of long-suffering , ever pining lover to a T , he’s more in love w / the idea of love than he is w / any single person . and he literally cannot hold down a relationship w/o fucking it up for himself in some shape or form .

kind of sarcastic ... v much the teasing type .... 

can b very impulsive at times , loves to go on solo adventures at night , prefers his own company tbh ...

overview : melancholic , reticent , noncommittal , humble , mild-mannered , romantic .

a mix of : josh from clueless and j.d. from heathers

more here .

MORE AESTHETICS.

the chill of silver jewelry against flushed skin , forgotten graffiti on porcelain sinks , flickering motel lights , kisses sticky with vodka , eyes ringed with lavender , sleepless nights surrendered to the dull buzz of television , obscure art house films , sun-kissed cheeks , the surprise of summer rain , chest aching with lost loves , scattered baby’s breath and rosemary , and a shared smile between perfect strangers .

CHARACTER DISSERTATION.

nico was born on a brisk wintry morning in the fashion district of los angeles ( january 21st , 1997 ) to a family of six .

as the second youngest child , and the only male son to boot , nico grew up with his only inheritance being a generational kind of hunger , one that demanded for more than what his struggling parents could offer

the arts stole nico at an early age ... ushering him into a world of creation and freedom beyond the four bleak walls he daily occupied . from spending lonely summers tucked away in some forgotten corner in the library to practicing on a borrowed violin from dawn to dusk , nico knew that even with nothing at his disposal , there was always something to be made w/ the tools he’d been given  

despite not having the money for private tutors to hone their son’s growing artistic talents , his parents did whatever they could to support his dreams , whether that meant working double shifts back to back or scrounging for loose change underneath the sofa cushions to pay for whatever materials nico needed .

it was in this strange way that nico grew up p spoiled . somehow having nothing while also having absolutely everything at the same time .

very much a family man , the first big purchase nico made once he broke out in hollywood was a house in beverly hills for his parents . now that he’s finally at a place where he can take care of his family , nico makes sure that his parents and sisters want for nothing

while he showers everyone else with generous gifts and obscene amounts of money , nico doesn’t particularly feel comfortable doing the same for himself . he’s a simple man through n through . one who’s content to spend his time walking his dog late at night , listening to a podcast on his airpods , instead of going out to a club w/ other well-known socialites .

a true artist at heart , nico refuses to conform to the current trends of hollywood , instead insisting on wearing thrifted clothes to important galas — ‏‏‎much to the frustration of his PR team and the chagrin of his stylists . but none of the choices nico makes seems to surprise anyone anymore . driving flashy cars and wearing designer clothes has never really been his style , after all . and it’s important to him that he remain authentically himself despite everything .

WANTED CONNECTS.

pr relationship ( open ) : someone that nico is contractually obligated to date ... i could totally see there being drama ‘n tension from having to pretend to actually like each other ... would b better if they rly did not like each other at all ... 

fwb ( open ) : buddies who bump uglies sometimes ... they both agreed they’d never catch feelings for each other but we’ll see ... 

frenemies ( open ) : someone that grinds nico’s gears but they’re a friend of his friend ... so they’re forced to keep it civil . i can see them exchanging hateful comments in the back of their friend’s car while simultaneously posting pics of each other on ig to keep up the rouse . 

unrequited crush ( open ) : likely nico would not realize if yr muse had a crush on them ... but it’d be fun to play it out like a kdrama anyway heh heh

a close friend group ( open / any ) : i thought it’d b so cute if there was like a small group of friends , maybe 3-4 ppl , that do stupid shit like ditch going to celebrity after-parties to break into abandoned buildings , get real high , ask stupid ‘ would u rather ‘ questions , and do sum main character type shit ... yk what im puttin down ... ‘n nico is def the type to open up in the presence of extroverts so i think having a group of wild outsiders of diff bgs would b v inch resting ..

enemies / rivals ( open / any ) : tbh nico prob rubs ppl the wrong way since he has resting bitch face ‘n never wants to talk to anyone .. so im sure there r ppl who just do not like this mf ... and rest assured that the feeling is mutual ...

bad / good influence ( open / any ) : nico’s known to mount his high horse often ... mr morality over here ... so i just know he prob would butt heads w/ the residential troublemaker . tho nico’s artwork can be controversial and out of the box at times , his art style and his personality are at constant odds , and it’d b interesting to have that bad influence / good influence dynamic w/ someone .

family friend ( open ) : someone who grew up w/ nico in dtla ... couldve gone to the same public school as him ... or their families couldve gone to the same church ...

ok my intro post has become a fucking behemoth so im going to stop here ‘n just say i have so many more wcs in mind so if u wanna plot lets just talk hehe :>

[zhuhongs]

Here’s my long ass review of TGCF that literally no one asked for it i have opinions and I have no one to tell them too so i must write them out and post them. (also part of this is abt the mdzs novel bc i can’t not compare them and I have a lot of thoughts abt that too)

This is very very long so it’s going under a read more. Spoilers ahead!!

Okay so first off this book was a fucking behemoth i can’t believe i read all of that (minus the extras) in under a week.. what the fuck. I definetly got reading fatigue halfway thru book 3.

I’m gonna separate my thoughts into sections bc i  have a few points that don’t all relate

firstly, overall writing and organization:

I said it earlier but tgcf is a lot more structurally sound than mdzs imo. My biggest criticism of the MDZS novel (minus the bad sex scenes, homophobia, and general I hate mxtxness of it) was the way the flashbacks were presented. 

Like OH MY GOD they were presented so badly. I hated that the flashback was told intermittently and only when one of the characters invoked the past. For example, when WWX meets Jiang Cheng and a second time, Jin Ling distracts JC to release “Mo Xuanyu” bc he saved his life in the Nie Ancestral hall earlier. WWX then proceeds to be the self sacrificing dude he is and take away Jin Ling’s curse and put it on himself. When he escapes and returns to LWJ, LWJ offers to carry him.

 If you watched CQL, you know exactly what LWJ is referring to when he says smth to the effect of “You once offered to carry me too, remember.” HOWEVER in the novel you don’t know what he’s talking about. This is because the flashback wasn’t been revealed to you yet. The next chapter goes to tell the flashback. I think that this takes away all of the emotional depth away from the scene. But in CQL, having the flashback already be known, you make the connection on your own and are like “awww wangji remembers that.. even 16 years later.“ Its a lot sweeter bc you know what the two have gone thru. At this point in the MDZS novel its barely the 30th chapter or so and you have no real idea what wangxian have been thru together or what reasons wangji has for loving wwx. You just think, well obviously they like each other bc this is a danmei novel and they are the two leads, ofc they have to like each other. But in cql, you learn through watching them that they’re in love. It’s not just like”well they have to be!! its a bl!!”

Okay that was a rlly long side tangent but it makes me so angry. So what did any of that have to do with TGCF?? well tgcf doesn’t have this issue. In fact, i believe that it gains a lot from having the flashback withheld from the reader. 

I really liked how the flashbacks were contained to books 2 and 4 respectively because it adds a layer of mystery. Hua Cheng is a very secretive man so it makes sense for us to not know everything about him upfront. The way that the author teases and hints little things at you make you want to know more, making it all the more satisfying when the truth is revealed. Because in a way you Know that Hua Cheng meets Xie Lian before and you know that he’s the child XL saved during the God Pleasing Ceremony but you don’t know all the details. Like obviously since Hua Cheng is a ghost you know that he’s died and it was likely for Xie Lian or Xian le’s sake but you probably never expected that he actually died twice. Once on the battle field and second when he took the human face disease. I think the difference between these flashbacks and the flashbacks in MDZS result from the length. In TGCF you get two long concise flashbacks that make sense to be placed where they are. Book 2 because you already have a feel and hint at what the characters have been through and book 4 because the White No Face appears again so then you learn how he and Xie Lian met before. It wouldn’t make sense to place book 2 any earlier bc there is no emotional impact. And it doesn’t make sense to place book 4 earlier because you don’t know what the white no face’s deal is so it’d be confusing. In MDZS, you get numerous short flashbacks happening alongside the main story and it makes it hard to piece together the timeline in a way that feels satisfying. Ik a lot of ppl grill cql for having a confusing intro episode and having a rlly long flashback but its much better than the mdzs novel. However the mdzs donghua handles the flashback in the most concise way imo.

Overall i think the way the story is structured is very good and is a step up from mdzs. Also the horror aspects of tgcf are rlly enjoyable and honestly i think mxtx should just write short horror stories at this point. like enough long ass novels chock full of fetishization. just write some fun horror with no romance and call it a day.. pls

Side Characters:

okay so straight up, i think the side characters arent used as well as they were in mdzs bc mxtx wanted to focus on hualian and didn’t want to give the side characters as much focus. This is a weaker point of the novel.

I’ll get into it more below but i think hua cheng was done dirty as a character by having him rlly only care abt xie lian. Since he doesn;t have any real relationships with others outside of xie lian this takes away from having more depth in the side characters. They’re really only related as far as xie lian’s relationship with them. Though thankfully xie lian gets rather close with a few officials and the ones we get to see more of are rlly interesting. I especially loved the reconciliation of mu qing, feng xin, and xie lian at the end of book 5. honestly their relationship was one my favorites and i’m glad they finally said what they had to say to each other after 800 fucking years. Also Shi Qingxuan is a delight. we stan sqx in this house.

The characters i wish we had seen more of were yushi huang (although she didnt rlly want to be there, good for her), Quan Yizhen and Yin Yu. I very much wish yizhen and yin yus story happened earlier on and we had more time with them. It felt strange to have their subplot occur towards the end and it was sort of out of place but i liked them a lot!! i wish there was more to it. and that there was a reconcilation but mxtx hates happy shidi’s doesnt she, (glares at novel jc). Also man yin yu did NOT have to die like that i’m sad.

Also, honestly.. i don’t think qi rong added to the story whatsoever and i have no clue why he and guzi were there. qi rong just pissed me off the whole time and added literally nothing.

going back to yushi huang, i’d like to say for the millionth time that i hate how mxtx uses any of her female characters. like we get it.. u hate women being useful... im still pressed but what i want to say has been said many times before so ill leave it at that.

Hualian:

I really really did like hualian at the end. They had a truly epic love story and it was so beautiful, especially when hua cheng repeated his words as wuming to xie lian as he started to disappear. But, I said it once and i’ll say it again. I don’t think Hualian is a super healthy relationship. As fiction its fine (i firmly believe fiction impacts reality but let me finish), i guess bc literally nothing about their situation can be replicated irl and none of it ended up containing manipulation or abuse or anything bad but there was a potential for it to and i’m really glad it didnt go that route.

Hualian is a highly idealized and romanticized relationship full of some truly troubling feelings of self worth. While its “beautiful” in a way that hc really was xls most devoted believer, it wasnt healthy for him to live for xl like this. Nor was it healthy for xl to feel so unworthy of hua chengs love.  

Hua Cheng’s devotion to Xie Lian is a little too extreme and it bothers me. When the truth was revealed abt the Temple of 10,000 Gods I had the same reaction as Mu Qing and Feng Xin. I was like... HEY WHAT THE FUCKK that’s a little uh... thats NOT HEALTHY,, dianxia PLEASE say smth. But ofc Xie Lian didn’t say fucking anything and and i was so pissed. Like the whole thing of Hua Cheng living his life solely for XIe Lian is really kinda fucked up and not romantic. I was holding out hope that at some point XIe Lian would sit him down and be like “Hey! I love you and i’m really grateful that all these years you’ve still believed in me when no one else did. But you can’t just live your life for my sake. You deserve love from many other other people and deserve to have a life and happiness outside of me. I still want to spend the rest of my life with you, but you need to not only think of me.” or something to that effect

It bothers me that after Xie Lian learns the truth he doesn’t once reassure Hua Cheng that he didn’t have to make Xie Lian his reason for existence. Like.. idk i just think that’s rlly kinda unhealthy. Like I understand why Hua Cheng is so deeply devoted to Xie Lian-- he saved his life twice and was the only one to ever show him kindness and he’s seen xie lian suffer a fate worse than death multiple times. I get that he wants to protect him and make his life easier, but to not let anyone else into his life and spend 800 years looking for xie lian is just overkill. Like if the whole 10k statues thing never happened i’d be 100 percent fine with hualin but the whole devotion to that extent... uhhh yea.. no that put a bad taste in my mouth. Obsession should not be romanticised. I don’t think any reader of tgcf is going out and deciding to live like hua cheng obviously but still.

Also Side note, the whole 100 swords scene.. bro i felt for hua cheng, the way he screamed seeing that, i don’t blame him. I was so horrified reading that chapter. i don’t think i’ve been so horrified by a piece of media like that in a while. Poor fucking xie lian.. oh my god. I understand the intense reaction he had and how seeing that prompted such a degree of loyalty but still.. 10k statues?? the cave that mu qing and feng xin saw... thats a little too much obssession... like please.. dial it back.. im begging u.

I was talking to mary (liviahyes) and she said smth abt how Hua Cheng doesn’t have a character outside of xie lian. And she’s right, he kinda doesn’t. If Xie Lian didn’t exist neither would Hua Cheng. I get that that counds kinda romantic but in practice i don’t think its a good things. Especially because Xie Lian has a story outside of Hua Cheng, hehas goals, he has friends, he has something. Hua Cheng said it-- his only dream is Xie Lian. Which is romantic but very very unbalanced. 

THAT BEING SAID, i still rly liked their relationship and i think theyre cute they just have issues they need to work through. I mean they have time but yea. It wasn’t perfect but eh. overall i’m bitter bc they couldve been THAT COUPLE but theyre so many bad implications as mentioned above and i.. smh. They still have amazing moments. Like the lantern scene, the alter scene, the “what matters is you, not the state of you”, the end when hua cheng helps release the shackles on xie lian, the scene where hua cheng disappears, the way xie lian waited for him, like they were so close to being THAT COUPLE but then mxtx and her fujo ass just had to make it uncomfortable like that. i’m so bitter. Like the reason why i wrote out all of this is bc this novel could’ve been great but so many little things added up and made the experience far more sour than it shouldve been.

MXTX did hua cheng SO DIRTY by not giving him a character much outside of loving xie lian and being good at everything. Like when I first learned abt how Hua Cheng beat 33 heavenly officials at what they excel in best i was like WHO IS THIS LEGEND but honestly.. he rlly doesn’t have any motivations outside of helping xie lian and I wish he had more to him . Like if we had more situations like the one where hua cheng dug out his own eye to save the group of mortals on mount tong’lu then he’d have been a much more well rounded character. Honestly, that’s rlly the only instance where he seems to have taken xie lians ideals to heart. I wish we had more of that bc that scene was so cool. i wish it hadn’t been revealled so late and there was more than one occasion where he defends others (minus xie lian ofc) without anything for himself to gain that.

To contrast hualian with wangxian, i think wangxian work so well bc at their core, they have the same life goals and same ideas about people and the world. Where in hualian, xie lian has core principles and morals and hua cheng is just like, anything for xie lian. SMH they couldve been great but overall i think hualian falls flat for me because of my own fear of dating someone who doesn’t have a life outside of dating me. Moreso, my parents had this sort of unbalanced relationship towards the end of their marriage and it ended very badly and yea, i just can’t whole heartedly love relationships that in any way resemble this, even if it ends differently. that’s a personal thing tho.

I don’t think Hua Cheng has ANY bad intentions towards Xie Lian or ever will. I don’t think he’s ever manipulated xl or tried to force him to love him. But again, it’s my own personal feelings that makes me feel kinda.. ehh conflicted abt hualian. There was potential but again.. fujoshis ruin everything... smh. Overall i think the way it ended redeemed the issues it had but still there were issues and i really wish xie lian like,, reassured hua cheng about living his life freely at some point but whatever. 

IN CONCLUSION

TGCF had the potential to be better than mdzs, it rlly did but it was bogged down by the authors own toxic mentalities abt love, and mlm relationships, and treating women like ppl and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I enjoyed this book, truly i did (otherwise i wouldn’t have stuck through and read 750k words of it) but there are some flaws that cannot be glossed over. I hope that tgcf when it does get adapted, goes through the same miracle that cql did and makes the characters more like ppl and less like tropes but i doubt it. Also i highly doubt that a live action tgcf is feasible given the supernatural aspects of the series but we shall see. I’m excited for the donghua when it eventual comes out but i will continue to be critical of the novel bc..well.. you see why. idk if i’d reccommend this book tbh bc like yes i would, no i would... well.. </3. yea. overall, it sure was something that i enjoyed in spades. especially the last 5 chapters. I generally liked it but had many issues with it at the same time, but honestly, yea thats the standard fair for a mxtx novel. 

[fiftyshadesgrl]

This is part one of a brantley gilbert series im working on. Hope everyone enjoys it.

Is this the wrong thing to do? After everything that went down between me and Brantley, should I really be doing a meet and greet with him? The last time we were in a room together a lot of words were said and our relationship ended. I thought we were going to last forever. We were engaged, I was planning a wedding while Brantley was drinking himself into a early grave. As I pull up to the venue my hands start sweating and I seriously think about backing out, but he has sure come a long way and I just want him to know that I am proud of him.

45 minutes later

Its my turn next in the meet and greet. All of the fans stand behind a curtain until it is our turn. Security motions for me to head out to see Brantley. I take a deep breath and realize its now or never. I walk from around the curtain and Brantleys eyes go wide. "(Y/N), is that you?" I smile and nod, he opens his arms and grabs me. This feels so good, just like it used to. His strong arms is what made me feel safe. I sigh and start to tear up but then I pull away.

He smiles and eyes me up and down. "(Y/N), youre the last person I thought would walk around that curtain."

I place my hand on the side of his face and wish things were different. "I just wanted to come and tell you how proud I am of you."

"Well darlin, you couldve called." He says with a sigh. I cant believe Im standing here in front of him. Those blue eyes just peer into my soul. My heart skips a beat when I hear his songs on the radio. Sometimes I feel like some of them has been written just for me.

Security tells Brantley they need to wrap up the meet and greet. Brantley looks annoyed but he has a show to put on and many fans that he cant let down.

We get our picture taken and then he turns to me. He grabs my hands in his, "do you have a backstage pass?" I shake my head and say, "no just vip."

He called his manager over and whispered something in his ear. His manager produced a backstage pass. Brantley took it from him and handed it to me. "Here darlin, you can watch from backstage and then we can hang out afterwards."

I shook my head, "Brantley I cant accept this. I dont want you doing me favors."

He placed it around my neck. "Then this is a favor for me. Please I really want to talk to you after the show."

How could I say no to him. He really looked sincere and there is some things that I could get off my chest after the show. So I nod and he has the biggest smile on his face. "Thank you (Y/N). It really means alot to me."

"Youre welcome." I go to hug him and he surprises me by kissing me on my forehead. His manager leads me to Brantleys dressing room. "Make yourself at home honey."

"Thank you. Is it alright if I smoke in here?" I ask showing him my pack of cigarettes. He chuckles, "BG is like a chimney. Ash tray is on the table. Drinks and snacks are in the other room if you want anything. If you need anything else just holler."

I nod and light my cigarette as he walks out the door. Its really nice in here. A big leather couch is against one wall right across is a mirror with lights around it. A chair sits in front of it but Brantley doesnt seem the type to need makeup to go on stage. I put my cigarette out in the ash tray and sit back in the couch. It feels like a cloud. I look around trying to find something to occupy me, I flip through my phone. I snap a picture and send it to my best friend with a text saying 'guess i get to go backstage.'

He sends a text back saying 'be careful. Dont let him hurt you again.' I roll my eyes and shut my phone off. I get up and decide to go get something to drink. When I open the door Brantley is on the other side, I think he was giving hisself a pep talk before coming in. He looks worried, "youre not bolting already are you?"

I shake my head. "No, I was going to get something to drink." He sighs like he is glad that I wasnt leaving.

"You mind if I come with you?" He asks shyly.

"Of course not. This is all for you anyways."

We walk down the hall to the room that has the sign catering on the door. He holds the door open for me and as I enter his hand brushes mine. I feel the sparks way down deep and I know he does too.

After we enter the room I grab a water and he gets a plate of food and a tea. The room is quite crowded and noisy. He looks at me and asks, "wanna go back to the dressing room?" I shrug and mouth its up to you. He nods towards the door and I follow him. He pushes the door open and holds it for me.

When we get back to the dressing room he plops down on the couch and puts his feet up on the table. I sit down on the other end of the couch and he looks like he is affended. "What are you doing all the way down there darlin? I aint gonna bite ya."

I smile and scoot closer to him. I take a sip of my water and light another cigarette. I smoke alot when Im stressed or nervous.

"Wheres your food darlin?" He asks looking at my bottle of water.

"Oh, um." I look down at my hands. "Im not hungry."

He shakes his head, "no, I aint having it. Youre gonna eat. Here take my plate Ill go get some more."

Before I could say anything he placed his plate in my lap and was already out the door. I really wasnt hungry. My nerves were getting the best of me and my stomach was in knots.

Brantley came back in a few minutes later with two huge plates of food. I raised my eyebrows at him as he sat down. "You dont expect me to eat that do you Brantley?"

He shook his head, "no one plate for me and the desserts are for both of us."

I picked at my food as we talked about old times and before I knew it they were calling him for the show. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the couch.

"Come on (Y/N), you can watch from the side."

He opened strong and the crowd went wild. After a few upbeat songs he pulled out his acoustic and sat on a stool center stage.

"Welcome everybody yall are amazing."

The crowd cheered loudly as he took a sip of water. He looked over at me and winked causing a face splitting grin to appear on my face.

"I figured wed slow it down a bit for a while. These next few songs mean alot to me. I wrote them for someone special and maybe just maybe."

He looks over at me again.

"She just might hear them tonight."

He starts playing the best of me and glances at me every now and then. Then he starts you dont know her like I do. Then he finishes with you promised. He gets emotional during that song and he looks directly over to me when he sings the last line.

"No matter what you do, you know Ill always love you.

Hell I have to, cause I promised."

The tears streamed down my face. I knew he meant it and after all these years, deep in my heart. I knew I still l loved him. I never stopped, but thats what scares me. Hes changed yes but how could I forget the past?

He was still looking at me as I turned and walked back to the dressing room. I couldnt let him see me cry, so I sat in the dressing room and cried. I went to light my cigarette but couldnt find my lighter anywhere. Brantleys lighter was gone too.

My eyes went to his duffel bag and thought maybe he might have a spare lighter in there. I unzipped it and tried not to look to much at anything but I felt a lighter and as I pulled it out a paper came flying out too.

"Oh shit, I hope It didnt rip."

I picked it up, a picture fell to the floor. I bent to pick it up and saw it was the last picture me and Brantley had made together. That was the better days before everything went bad. I cant believe he has kept it all this time.

"Yall have been awesome tonight! I love yall see ya again soon."

I heard Brantley closing the show so I shoved the paper and picture back in his bag and zipped it quickly. I grabbed my cigarettes and ran to the exit.

The cool air hit my skin like a gift from heaven. I had to take a breather for a moment cause I didnt know what to say to him. Why has he kept that all this time? Why did it make me smile that he did? Because I love him but I cant tell him. Tonight was just to see him and go home.

I sit with my back against the building and lit my cigarette. I looked down at the lighter in my hand and was surprised to see it was the zippo I got him for his birthday one year. This man, does he keep everything.

The band starts coming out of the doors and start loading the bus with equipment and luggage. A few minutes later Brantley came struting out looking frustrated. He couldnt see me because I was sitting behind the door.

I heard him say to his manager, "why didnt you stop her! I need to go find her."

Before he climbed the steps on the bus I stood up and said "you looking for me?"

I could see the relief wash over him. He ran over to me and grabbed me up in a big hug. "I thought I lost you again baby girl."

I smiled and pulled away from him. "Im right here. I just needed some air." He grabbed me by the back of my head and pulled me in for a fierce kiss. It shocked me for a second then I was kissing him back. Our tounges exploring each other mouth. I nipped his lower lip and he growled in response.

I pulled away but he rested his forehead on mine. We were both panting and I managed to find the words. "Brantley, I....I cant do this."

"Come on the bus with me, we can talk cause theres some stuff I need to tell you."

"I dont think thats a good idea Brantley."

He sighs and those blue eyes pierce right into the depths of my soul and break down whatever barriers I had built to keep him out.

"Please, just to talk. I promise."

I nod, "okay, just to talk."

He smiles and grabs my hand. He leads me towards the bus and motions for me to go first. He doesnt speak to anyone but heads straight for his room. He closes the door behind him.

He sits down on the bed and pats the place next to him.

"You can sit baby doll, dont worry I wont do anything."

"I know, I trust you." I sit down next to him but for some reason the words that I have been wanting to say will not come out. Thank god he spoke first.

"Listen (Y/N), I know the last time we saw each other I was a complete mess."

"Complete mess is putting it lightly." I say

He sighs, "ok, I was a complete dick. I know I hurt you and I said things I didnt mean. I swear to you I have changed. I love you (Y/N) I always have, and if you give me a chance." He grabs my hand and I look into his eyes. "I promise you I will make up for everything baby."

I really do believe him but why is it so hard to just give myself to him. "You cheated on me Brantley. You told me you didnt want me anymore. I wanted to marry you and have a family with you. I saw all of that happening but it was all just one big lie."

"Baby look at me." He says as he places his fingers under my chin. My eyes meet his once again. "Im so sorry for everything. After all these years it still eats at me what I done to you. I was fucked up at the time. The booze and pills had me all kinds of fucked up but it didnt mean I didnt want you. I honestly cant tell you why I said that but I can tell you I didnt mean it." I start crying and try to look away but he wouldnt let me.

"You were the best thing that ever happened to me and I was to stupid to realize it. I shouldve treated you better when I had you but for some reason I thought you would always be there. When I sobered up and realized you was really gone I went crazy. I went everywhere and anywhere that I thought you would be. I cried every night and every day I felt like my heart was just gone."

I wiped my eyes and whispered, "Im so sorry Brantley."

"No, no baby, Im the one whos sorry. I dont blame you for leaving me. Hell nobody did. Mama jumped my case everyday for a month about it."

I sniffed, "I found the picture of us in your duffel bag."

"You did?"

I nodded, "I wasnt being nosey I promise. I lost my lighter and couldnt find it or yours so I thought maybe you had a extra one. I didnt look at anything or at the piece of paper the picture fell out of."

He sighed and it looked like he was glad I didnt read it. "I kept that picture because thats all I had of you. Every night before a show looking at it would give me the boost I needed to have a damn good show. When I sleep, I put it under my pillow. I know its stupid but I have to have you with me or I cant survive."

I smile and before I knew it I was kissing him. He kissed me back at first then he gently pushed me away. "Woah baby, you said you only wanted to talk."

I straddled him and pushed his hat from his head. "I know what I said." I kissed his cheeks then his eyes then his lips. "Listen to what my heart is saying now."

His hands were on my sides sliding up and down, his thumbs were under my shirt. He was tracing lazy circles with them. He leaned forward and kisses my collarbone then my neck. "You sure baby." I nodded.

I pulled his shirt up and over his head. He did the same to me. I was wearing a black lace bra, he growled as he kissed the tops of my breast where the lace touched skin.

"God damn baby, I have been missing and wanting this all these years. Im afraid its a dream."

I smiled as I kissed up his neck up to his ear. I whispered "trust me honey, I dont think your dreams can make you feel as good as Im gonna in just a few minutes."

"Holy fuck." He said as he pulled away and took my lips in a searing kiss. He unclasped my bra with one hand. My hand skated down his chest and stomach and came to rest on his belt buckle.

"Make love to me Brantley."

He smiled, "oh baby, with pleasure."

[tfw-no-tennis]

huntoxhunto

we watched 2 whole more eps but we’re abt to vacay so i better recap this biz now before i forget

ok so we finished the zoldyck arc and uhhhh gotta say we werent expecting like any of that to happen lol 

ok ill back up so we start w/killuas mom (i dont think we ever heard her name) confronting gon & co....and canary (i lov her) is not dead which i assumed but thank goodness. 

zoldyck mom was totally using nen. also she is off her rocker gotta say. tho that visor is super cool, albeit confusing - is it connected to a bunch of security cameras or something? how does she see all that shit? 

granpa is wild. his tunic thing that says ‘one kill a day’ or w/e is kinda hilarious, it reminds me of the ‘apple a day keeps the dr away’ saying...a murder a day keeps the....idk away????

i love that killua makes it abundantly clear that he couldve like escaped at any time lol. also tho why didnt he just escape....baby boy just leave 

killua getting all serious and threatening milluki if he messes with gon....my boys got it BAD 

this family has so many communication issues hvbjadkfbjaskdfj nobody is on the same page at all 

the butler guy continued to remind me of kuro one piece this whole time...i was waiting for him to bust out the ridiculous cat claws

oh my GOD wait the flashbacks of EVEN BABIER KILLUA were so precious ;_; he was soooo tiny and cute oh my god. so precious. and canary was also so tiny and cute 

baby killua really just wanted a friend :(((( and canary wanted to be friends w/him but knew that mom zoldyck would kill her if she overstepped like that :( thats so tragic mannnn

also canary is so cool man. her beating up all those guys was epic

ok that whole scene with killua and his dad was like, such a rollercoaster lmao

like....it was all over the place for me...first of all the ambiance was wack, the room lighting was weird and im p sure killuas seat was an electric chair??? and the dad was in a coffin thing..???? like....interesting aesthetic choices all over the place here 

also i see now where killua got his hair and also his catboy tendencies. the zoldyck catboy genes seem to trace back to zoldyck dad, who has kinda scary cat eyes 

also im guessing that the dad is the blood zoldyck and the mom is the one who married in. they sure seem to put a lot of emphasis on like, family legacy or w/e, but the two parents certainty go abt it in different ways 

the whole convo b/w killua and his dad was wild, it totally didnt go where i was expecting it to. his dad was weirdly chill while also being super intense? 

killua happily telling stories abt gon was so sweet....baby boy baby 

and his dad telling him ‘never betray your friends’ was rlly interesting...i wonder what his reasons were for saying that 

cause then he tells killua he can leave, and killua does, but then dad zoldyck tells mom zoldyck (i rlly need to find out their names) that he thinks killua will come back on his own time....inch resting 

i wonder if dad zoldyck made killua promise that bc he was trying to set killua up for failure - as in, he tells killua to never betray his friends, thinking that killua inevitably will & be distraught abt it, and then turn back to the zoldyck family when this happens. idk

also its interesting to me that zoldyck dad wants killua to lead the family someday. like, illumi is right there, hes the oldest and clearly dedicated to being an evil assassin, and he seems p good at it...i wonder why killua is the favorite....the grandpa (i think) did say that killua is Special(tm) which...yes he is a special baby boy i love him. i wanna see more zoldyck family flashbacks/interactions so we can see what led them to this point 

oh lord that reminds me of illumi briefly appearing in the killua flashback and hes just like, suddenly there, wearing some gay ass sweater....like ok dude did you just come back from the Evil Assassin Library or st?????

that reminds me too, ruth tells me that apparently in the manga illumi and hisoka got married or something???? to which i say, thats fucking wild, but also it makes sense, those two are both horrible and disgusting and they absolutely deserve each other hbvajvhsdfjbak peak evil nasty gay rep, i love it. i cant wait to see whatever the fuck the context to that is bc, thats fucking wild

ok back to the plot so like its so wild to me how smoothly everything went hvubsjduhfbjsh like....killuas dad was rlly like ok u can leave and killua just went to the butler house and then canary woke up and was like ok gon & crew lets go to the butler house to see killua, fuck the rules, (and she didnt even get killed for ‘disobedience’ or w/e, or more likely - in most big shounen, she wouldve been attacked by the other evil butlers and gon wouldve had to fight them)

killua Rlly was like fuck this place im leaving my boyfriend and his parents are here to pick me up [puts on gayest outfit he owns and skateboards away] hvbhsjdfbjdkf

i love killuas weird gay preteen fashion so far and i cant wait to see more 

killua telling the butler guy to let him know as SOON as gon gets there cause he wants to see him AS SOON AS HE CAN ;_; bro they r....in love 

of course the butler is trickey tho lmao, any other shounen this wouldve turned into an 8 ep long fight scene sequence where gon has to fight the butlers in order to see killua 

and the of course gon is the same way, gon is like i need to see killua RIGHT NOW take me to him!!! ohhh my god babies

the whole coin game was wild, it was funny when the other butlers got involved too lmao 

when gon was like ‘hey leorio can i see your knife’ i was like OH NO I DONT LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING. and i was right bc OWWWWW baby boy oh my god!!!! but that seems to have solved it even tho thats NOT how swelling works at ALL- 

anyways gon is a cute smart good boy and i also find it funny how killua eventually gets impatient and just busts in on this whole dramatic situation (and the tension immediately deescalates as a result lmao) 

tangent but god its so funny seeing all these butler guys deferring to killua, an actual 12 yr old....i wanna see the hilarious and hijink-filled results of killua being raised as a rich spoiled assassin prince. thats a lethal combo thats gotta result in some wildly skewed perceptions on how things work, especially paired with gon ‘probably eats dirt for fun and sleeps in trees’ freecess 

godddd gon and killuas lil reunion is SOOO cute they were so happy to see each other ;_; bro they are SO cuteeeee augh. two tiny babies

killua being like oh hi also uh kurapika andddd [looks at smudged writing on hand] lorpo 

hvhhbajfbs dont do my man leorio like that killua hes a hardworking father 

the fact that they just like. LEAVE...thats so wild. i cant believe how little fighting this arc had. this all wrapped up SO much faster than i could have ever anticipated lmao 

where the heck was alluka!? i assumed she’d show up here but uhhhh guess not......in the silhouette shot of all the zoldycks she and killua were holding hands ;_; my fucking uwus bro 

we also didnt see the grandma or great grandpa so im guessing theyll appear later 

gon being like fuck it im not using my hunters license til i punch hisoka in the fucking face hvbhahsfbjsk thats hilarious 

also a convenient way to let him have his hunters license but not utilize it til later in the story...its so early for him to have achieved that big chunk of his goal, which just shows that hxh is Not your typical shounen and isnt gonna just be centered around gons quest to become a hunter 

so we finally found out what hisoka said to kurapika....just as i thought, it was st to do w/the phantom troupe. so theres a handy setup for the yorknew city arc later. bam 

hisoka just being like ‘hey meet me in this (presumably) very large city on this date. no i will not tell you where in the city to meet me. bye seeya there’ 

tbf hisoka is very hard to miss 

god when they arrive and kurapika is just like ok well we got killua so im out lol bye everyone....bro hvbjkhgbfjhdksfhjk that felt so abrupt 

and then leorio was like oh yeah same i gotta go study time to take the fantasy MCAT or w/e

AND THEY BOTH LEFT....now gon and killua r chilling but im like oh my god no leorio kurapika come back, we need some (questionable) adult supervision over here 

and like immediately killua is like ok gon do you have money. and of Course gon doesnt have money. so killua is like well you need money and you need to train so you can deck hisoka, so lets go to a fantasy version of an underground fighting ring! this is why kurapika and leorio needed to stay 

tho they probably wouldve just gone along with it 

they did all promise to meet in yorknew city, but thats apparently like 6 months away. are gon and killua rlly gonna spend 6 months at heavens arena

the part where killua draws the diagram demonstrating how much of a n00b gon is....hvbajdkhfbhajskf

AND THEN when he drew himself into the diagram and was like :3c wow im so modest HBJHSKHDFHBJS that was so funny

it was like that post thats like ‘you can tell when a cats pupils change and they just shift into Silly Mode’ thats what killua looked like...catboy

so thats basically it i think, gon and killua are heading to heavens arena to join fight club or whatever. tournament arc time! 

PREDICTION CORNER: 

i doubt this is the last weve seen of the zoldyck family. i mean we havent even met 3 of them, and we barely saw the ones we did meet...idk when theyll come back but i suspect theyll be making some big money moves later on and fucking shit up somehow 

i think maybe illumi or someone will like, spy on killua sometimes to keep track of him. or theyll track him by other means

ill use the prediction corner to reflect on incorrect predictions so heres a few. i rlly thot killua was gonna be more edgy than he is but hes rlly just a good boy huh. like hes a gay baby assassin catboy but hes so cute and good too. he just wants to live his life and hang out with his tiny bf like... omg :’) 

also i thot hisoka held a totally different narrative role lbvahkfjhjjaksfl i thot he was like main villain guy....hes more like an annoying creepy clown dude who (probably) shows up a lot to bother the main cast. we’ll see, but thats what i think of him now

like i thought hisoka would be like p1 dio, where hed be/quickly become a powerful antagonist who would amass a bunch of followers/minions (when actually the only person he seems to hang out w/is illumi, and theyre more like equals than an evil guy/minion dynamic)...or like i thought hisoka would be very well known as a scary evil guy but nope he was just another participant in the hunter exam, albeit a weird freaky one whose rancid vibes everyone seemed to pick up on 

anyways actual predictions, i think hisoka is gonna be at heavens arena, which would be super funny. gon is like im gonna train to beat hisoka and he shows up to do that and hisokas just there like >;) hey

i think if i had to guess, the zoldycks will show up again (in a plot important way) at the end of the yorknew arc/before the greed island arc. i know basically nothing abt any of the arcs but i do know the order they go in so theres that

i do think illumi will show up earlier than the other zoldycks tho, since he seems to be out doing his own thing more than the rest. also we still really havent resolved the whole mind control thing that im still convinced of 

i think nen will finally be introduced/alluded to heavily in this arc...or like, characters will use nen and gon will be like whoa whats that 

i think killua knows what nen is...maybe? it would make sense since im sure all the zoldycks can use it (at least, we saw mom zoldyck use it, probably)

can killua use nen already? that would be pretty funny. i dont think so tho. maybe u learn nen at a certain age. i have no idea what nen is 

also isnt gons nen power the power to like, turn into a really buff version of himself or something. how the fuck does that work 

ok enough nonsense its bedtime zzzzz

[likeabulletyoucanhurtme]

Another horror film... Fender Bender

I decide what to watch films from listicles and stupid articles posted from facebook. I decide to do reviews/re-action blogs/liveblog posts, not because of the film but just if I have time/effort to put in. The Wikipedia entry for this film make it sound like a modern day slasher film/tribute. I like those films, Halloween, Nightmare On Elm Street, Scream etc, so let's hope this is a worthy successor. Ominous repeated music, not quite the Halloween piano but building tension Woman pours a tiny glass of wine, pauses, and then fills up the glass. Nice. Why is she wearing her housecoat from the bedroom to the bathroom? You live alone there's no need to be shy...or was that just for the censors? Closing the door when getting into the bath. Even when we know we are alone (or at least we think we are) then we still need to close the bathroom door for privacy. Wonder why? Too many bubbles in this bath so for those looking for a quick peek you'll be disappointed She drys one hand to pick up her phone but uses both to type her text, surely this will still get her phone wet? Also her fingers look too wrinkled for her to have just sat down in the bath, but that's just continuity and was probably the 20th take or something The texts are from her "Fender bender friend", woo movie title is mentioned! Her keyboard makes typing sounds. Does anyone still have that? Do we not all just mute it and have our phones on constant silence? He told her to enjoy the bath. Definitely freaking out now. I guess this is gonna be more of a stalker than a whodunnit The bathroom door just creaked open. I get its to add to the tension but hes not on the direct other side of the door so that was what, wind? She goes downstairs (in her housecoat) and one of the windows is wide open. Now surely if you're a psycho killer sneaking into someones house, you'd shut the window after you to avoid detection. Or at least I would...or I will now... Now she's given up on her bath and pulled the plug. Poured half her wineglass down the sink but didn't rinse it so thats a waste of a good glass AND gonna leave a stain She got into bed and the dude was literally lying in her bed like how did she not realise someone was there before she got in? And what kind of plan is that, to lie in their bed? Now she's out and halfway down the stairs before he's even got out of the covers! Also, what kinda gimp mask is he wearing? She tries to get out of the window she closed earlier and gets caught halfway. No fight. No resistance. Just screaming. Poor show. Three stabs from his weird knife thing but not a lot of blood spray or gore. Guy just put his change slowly on the counter at the petrol station. Customers like that are dicks. Give it to him in his hands! Girl's facetiming her friend, crying in the car as her bf and random cheerleader slut are on a date. Fuck him! Dry your eyes girl, you can do better! Andy (cheating bf prick) sees Hilary (crying gf) in the car and runs over saying the cheerleader doesn't mean anything. Hope she heard that and they both leave you, asshole She stops and The Driver (as the credits called him) hits her and causes the accident. He's lucky that shes not been paying attention or she'd realise he's been following her all the way. A more observant victim and you'd be in trouble mister, not a good serial killer plan really He calls her a virgin cause its her first accident, like if I didn't know you were a killer I'd still think you're a creepy dude It's her mum's car and it has a DNCEMOM personalised licence plate, maybe the car deserved to be scratched! She got in the car to get her information and I wonder what would have happened if she'd just drove away then and there? I also wonder if he gives over the real information to his victims. I guess there's no reason why he should, but I bet he's so full of himself that it probably is his right name. Now she's driving away and facetiming with her obviously-gay-best-friend... now I'm sure if I was just in an accident I'd be driving extra carefully and not keep looking at the phone screen every two minutes! Back home and her mum says she almost called the police because she was missing. Bit of an over-reaction; when your licenced daughter and your car are both gone it's not rocket science. Hilary has dance trophies - ok so the licence plate is justified, that still doesnt make it right Her dad says shes not to leave the house for any reason over the next day while they go on a trip, guess she's limited with hiding places when the driver comes for her later. Ok so you're not going on the trip with them Hil's but still - YOU HAVE AN EMPTY! Get over your boyfriend with a tub of ben and jerrys and wine... maybe keep a knife handy too, k? The car insurance woman is called Davidson. That's not a name, that's a surname! Oh ok apparently she's friends with the car insurance people and it's Mrs Davidson. Why would you answer the phone with your last name tho, that's just confusing? And who's on chatty minor-life-details-sharing basis with their insurance providor? She notices the drivers car going round her house-nows the time to get a big knife and carry it with you everywhere you go! I wonder if the phone number she gave the providor actually works? And who would answer? Hilary take your shoes off before you lie on the bed! You're just getting the place dirty! Her bear is called Harry Manilow...I'm sure barry is very proud Hilary's bedroom still has glow in the dark stars on the walls. I like it. She gets a txt saying sorry about today and she thinks its her ex. Surely you'd have his number saved? And there'd be a message history? He's calling himself a "fender bender friend" again, like this is not how you meet people. Especially when you're at least 12 years older. You don't need to be creepy with people before you kill them mate Her phone makes the noise when she's typing too, omg why? He's mentioned her parents leaving in another car, like obvious warning sign, do you like your victims to be scared first before you attack? At least he can't hide in her bed cause Hilary's not left hers yet Also once he's killed them I hope he deletes their message history because itd be pretty easy to track him down if not. There's a package left on top of her mums car that she was driving. Nope. Fuck that. You can get it in the morning. Leave it alone Hilary! The package was a cake that said sorry - could be from him or the ex, not sure I'm guessing he sneaked in while she was getting the package but seriously if he's in her bed I'm gonna start calling him the bedspread killer and not fender bender. Nope he's not, thank god. Well, not yet at least. Nice slow artistic panning camera shot...of Harry Manilow. Now she's going for a shower. No free nudity shots though you pervs Back in her bedroom she sees her phones been moved, and the last photos on if were her in the shower...nows time for that big knife Hils Instead, she's went back to the bathroom just to see, as if she doesn't know what her own bathroom looks like in pictures There's muddy footprints outside the bathroom but not anywhere else in their clean whitetiled house Ok so not a knife but shes got dressed and now has a baseball bat - its a start :) She's shouting out who's there though, like he's gonna actually answer her... Ok now it's her obviously-gay-friend and unnamed-blonde-lesbian-vibe friends from earlier. They have pizza :) That doesnt answer for who took the shower pictures though... Obviously-gay-friend says he took a picture of himself on the toilet "for shits and giggles" yeah cause thats a normal thing to do... Obviously-gay-friend is confirmed as gay, ha! He wants dessert but they havent actually eaten anything. Like no time lapse or anything. Full slices of pizza sitting right there untouched. Not impressed dude Obviously-gay-friend trying to defend creepy older man txting Hilary saying maybe there's some decent people left in this world. Sorry to disappoint you but nope, he's genuinely creepy Unnamed-blonde-lesbian-vibe confirms they didn't take pictures of Hilary in the shower Andy's at the door, drunk and being a prick. But he has muddy boots so maybe it was him taking the shower pictures? Hilary stays firm, smashes a vase and threatens him - you go girl! Aim for the head next time! The driver catches Andy at his car and kills him with the knifey thing. Three blows, one obviously in the head but again a distinct lack of blood splatter :( Ah well he deserved it. And also was he gonna drive away drunk? Did he drive drunk getting there? Driver might've actually saved more lives by killing him Obviously-gay-friend says although he's a stalker and creepy its a shame to let the apology go to waste - yeah fuck him eat the cake! She gets a phonecall from Mrs Davidson at the insurance place - like its obviously really late at night now - what you doing? Go home! Ok so the information The Driver gave Hilary was from the woman he killed at the start, just changed the first name. And that person reported as dead yesterday so this is the very next day. He moves fast. There's a powercut and suddenly he's in the middle of their living room just standing there chilling with his bloody knife. He smashes Hilary's phone before chasing them - takes care of the pictures and creepy txts I suppose, but still there's a trail with the insurance company and with her service providor if the police were to look Both gay friends who ate the cake feel ill - obviously drugged. Hilary takes obviously-gay-friend down some stairs and the rest of their house looks like its still being built because reasons. unnamed-blonde-lesbian-vibe's hiding under Hilary's bed, the driver walks around the bed then lies down beside her until she notices like why does he like lying beside people? He couldve pulled her out by her feet and saved himself the hassle! Rachel. Blonde-lesbian-vibe is now named! He trips up and she almost hits him over the head. He's not an invincible killer-if she wasnt drugged he'd have been in trouble He stabs her and she goes through a window-increasing likelihood of a neighbour hearing that or hearing her scream in the driveway. Not a good plan. All you serial killers, keep your victims in the house if possible to avoid detection Now he has to go outside to finish her off - lot of avoidable hassle He drives the car over her-messy. And I don't get why she didn't roll out of the way. Obviously-gay-friend's real name is Erik, but I'll stick to obviously-gay-friend He seems to be taking his time to search through an empty room of plastic sheets and only two other doors. I don't know if hes trying to build the tension and freak them out or if he just cant see because of that mask He leaves via the other door somehow and Hilary starts talking and moving, like no - stay hidden until he actually leaves ffs! Theyre heading for the same exit The Driver took, seriously? The Driver stabs obviously-gay-friend and finally there's a whole lot of blood. Took them long enough! Blood from his neck has somehow got on the back of his hand and dried into the shirt - continuity people! Hilary goes outside and finds Andy hung from a railing/fence - not subtle at all! The Drivers now back in his car and chasing Hilary around slowly - because reasons Rachel's also been hung on a fence in a different area for reasons which will be unexplained. It's like he wants to get caught. Hilary looks like she's now decided to fight - you go girl; you'll probably win, he's easy Finally grabs the big knife I've been telling her about She stabs him and he drops his bladed thing - TOLD YOU IT'D BE EASY!! She pours petrol over him though, and tries to light a match, when shed be easier just to keep stabbing him Hits him with a crowbar AND KEEPS HITTING HIM WITH THE CROWBAR - YES! GO FOR IT! She hits him again while they're walking outside - maybe the whole creepy txts and drugged cakes are to scare the victim to make up for his own inadequacies as a killer Looks like he managed to cut her arm but there's no blood or show of pain so maybe he missed? She sits in his car and notices on the roof inside is licences of all the other girls he's killed. But how has he managed to get away with it for so long? He's sloppy, and messy, and not that good a fighter. She throws the cigarette lighter at him and sets him on fire - but really she was doing so much better with the crowbar tbh. Takes him a good while to remember to stop drop and roll - if he did that first she'd have been fucked - stupid plan, but stupider killer She's going to get a phone from his pocket when what she should really be doing is hitting him with that crowbar first to make sure he's dead Also - I thought he smashed her phone earlier... Hilary's went inside to her bedroom like what the hell girl, phone the police! Oh yeah, house phone died earlier with Mrs Davidson. But yeah mobiles not really working either She looks out and he's not lying outside where he should be. Told you - shouldve kept at it with the crowbar He's watching her and she just backs away saying no - where'd your fight go? You can take him! Nah shes just a scared mess now, shame. He cuts her knees and we have blood! More blood from her legs than from the first victim... He says her life's meaningless but her death will be legendary. Not really getting a motive here are we? He's getting changed in Hilary's bedroom - leaving a whole lot of trace DNA and evidence everywhere And now he's using her shower - I tell you how this guy gets away with anything is beyond me, All the dead kids are in their own cars in the driveway, while he drives off - now with the DNCEMOM licence plates on his car. They're still not acceptable. Ahh so the money he uses for petrol is what he's stolen from his victims. Still doesn't explain why he didn't just hand it to the guy, dick